z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone Language Mature Content

Tick, tick, tick

by akanbright



Tick, tick, tick
goes the hand of time
which hasn't been good to us
'cause we failed to walk with it

Tick, tick, tick
moves the hand of time
not scared of what happens to us
not it business anyways

Tick, tick, tick
flies the hand of time
warning us of what lies ahead
time is precious; it says

Tick, tick, tick
ascends the hand of time
move steadily, as though waiting for us
but as we know, it waits for no one

Tick, tick, tick
cries the hand of time
walk thou with me
and accomplish a successful plan


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User avatar
701 Reviews


Points: 49988
Reviews: 701

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Thu Apr 08, 2021 5:34 pm
ForeverYoung299 wrote a review...



Tick tick tick– I am here for a review!!!!

Akanbright, you are doing awesome!! Now let me come to the review.

Tick, tick, tick
goes the hand of time
which hasn't been good to us
'cause we failed to walk with it

I absolutely love this stanza. I adore the way you described the hands of clock as the hand of time. U described how that is a disadvantage as we can't walk with it.
I really like the other stanzas as well. You did an extremely good job in writing that second lines. Time really waits for no one. It's precious and if we don't catch it at time, it flies away.

Overall, a very good job

~Forever




akanbright says...


Thanks. Was really helpful



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78 Reviews


Points: 40
Reviews: 78

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Thu Apr 08, 2021 11:40 am
NivedaJames22 wrote a review...



Hey!

First of all. lemme just say I loved your topic. I feel like its something everybody should wake up to. We all just have 24 hours a day. Those 24 hours are ours to waste or use as we please.

I feel like your poem powerfully reinforces this fact. I really enjoyed reading it.

I especially loved this part:

Tick, tick, tick
cries the hand of time
walk thou with me
and accomplish a successful plan

I don't know if this makes any sense, but the fact that you said "thou" instead of "you" makes me feel like Time is an ancient force, advising us in its infinite wisdom. I really liked that.

Can't wait to read more of your work.

Keep writing.




akanbright says...


Thank u




Doubt thou the stars are fire, doubt that the sun doth move. Doubt truth to be a liar, but never doubt I love.
— "Hamlet," William Shakespeare