-if we think harder and harder, then we can move better and better.
-life is like a wife we are married to, and can only live it when we understand it.
-if we move steadier and steadier, we might arrive a bit late, but wont make mistakes.
-if we ride easy easy, we won't be too busy busy.
-if we create a forum, the devil would have no room.
-when we go higher and higher, we 'll reach faster and faster.
-when we go deeper deeper, we cannot be anything like the leper.
-when we go smooth, we can't get a moth or a smut.
-if we go on dreaming, we 'll continue beaming.
-when we get lighter, we become brighter.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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Hi,
I like this poem a bunch! The only thing I have complaints about is the structure of the poem. Journeys aren't linear so I would expect the stanzas to be different from a list form. But that's your choice to make!
The last line especially was memorable; probably because I love poems that rhyme, no matter where it is in the poem!
Overall, a nice poem!
LCP
Thanks
Hey there! MapleWay here with a quick review!
This was a cool little poem about life! I liked how you used all of the causes and effects! The rhymes were also a nice touch! My favorite part was where you said, -if we move steadier and steadier, we might arrive a bit late, but wont make mistakes." It gives me slow and steady vibes!
Anyways great poem! Can't wait for the next one! Also sorry if my review was a bit short!
‘Poetry: General, General’
Loll
Yh
Hello Boo, I call others that, if you don’t mind
This a review if you don’t mind me doing one on your work
I liked how this is you feeling of life and how it flows and works. It forward nice for me and the feeling was smooth. I had fun reading this and it was ann enjoyable poem for me. I liked the work and the thought and how you worked it to flow together nicely.
Thanks boo