Well not much to write here for this poem but I will do the best I can. I will go sentence by sentence. First "'Sometimes people don't call back--"'. At first I was a little confused because I didn't know what you were talking about but after a while I finally I got it.
The second story I will not repeat because I will get in trouble but I don't get this at all because I don't think what you are talking about because out of nowhere you mention a BABY, a BABY, so I didn't know what you were talking about because there was nothing to do because you didn't have anything after it so I was getting confused.
The third sentence which isn't one but you says "'No, no!"' I think this is where you mention the baby because before you stated you didn't know what to do to it so I think that is where you would put that.
Finally I like the last sentence when you stated the first sentence and put it at the end so I like how you did that.
You need to keep writing poems and getting better. Keep writing and good job.
Points: 5328
Reviews: 59
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