"Student number 242, come forward!"
Cevan groaned. A reprimand on top of last week's detention meant another lecture from Dad. Not to mention the point loss... 'The Value of Education, Part 4,' ought to be good, he thought cynically.
He was halfway up the aisle towards the teacher, Ms. Vesper. Vesper the Viper, the others called her. He could see her now, her grotesque mouth in a grimace. It looked like she'd smudged her lipstick too.
"Student 242- Cevan- you have been performing a bit below par." Her mouth formed the words like they hurt her. "I would ignore it, but your conduct has been... unsightly."
I'm starting work on this again, comments appreciated.
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139,521 Literary Works • 672,597 Reviews
Great! Aboslutely wonderful! Umm, but somethings wrong! It is not finshed. So put on your thinking cap and get writting.
lol, sorry about that, had to get it off my chest. But really it is good.
I really liked this, it has a great start... and ending, in fact all 7 lines were good!
I am unsure about the plot, because I don't know what it si but it looks fantastic!
Thanks Nariel. And about the name, I think it should be pronounced "seven." What do you think?
I thought this started off really good! I have an idea for your student # 242. When I read it, it kind of reminded me of concentration camps where the people are known by their numbers. Maybe you main character could be in some kind of camp???
There's your idea. Otherwise, good start!
Nariel