Never before have I felt so strong.
I can do anything!
Have anything!
The world listens to me now.
I have the power to destroy all!
Worlds! Universes!
Stand aside puny mortal!
Earth is nothing but dust.
I will rewrite the
Laws of science!
Rage
All I have is rage.
Everyone who wronged me will perish!
Flames will engulf my foes!
Even in the middle of destruction...
Have you ever seen a sunset so beautiful?
Tis a backwards world indeed.
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137,583 Literary Works • 672,048 Reviews
I find this poem very creative and also beautiful. I love the overall concept and the manner in which you end it. At first you start with numerous exclamations and then the number decreases until the speaker suddenly changes tone. This is truly a great poem and I've read some of your other poems, so I can say that you are a seriously amazing poet. You have a huge amount of creativity!
I cannot find a single punctuation point in this poem for which to criticize you.
Even in the middle of review day...
Have you ever seen a poem so beautiful?
'Tis an excellent poem indeed.
Thanks!
PeanutPhoebe, here to give a review!!
First things first. The title is spelled "Reaf" which I think is supposed to be backwards "Fear" which it is not. I loved the creativity in this. I really had to think and start writing it out to figure out the phrase in bold letters. I would not have been able to this, it was amazing. The only other thing I'd say I didn't like was the beat. It was off most of the time. Other than that, you did awesome!!;) Good job, and keep writing!!
Lady Celestia, the Golden Knight.
Ah, but look up the definition of "Reaf"
and it was supposed to look like fear backwards, but evidently it is not
Knight Dragon, here to review!
Technical:
This may just be a preference thing, but I felt this would have read and flowed better with a comma instead of an exclamation point.
Again, I wanted something a little different. Maybe delete the exclamation point, and add the word "All" in front of "Universes" (and decapitalized Universes of course).
This needed some form of punctuation. Maybe a period or hyphen. I don't feel like a comma would be right there.
Last thing. I felt like the backwards should have been backward. Backwards just felt awkward, like I had to tag on the "s" in my mental reading.
Having glanced through caeai's review, I would say that the comma after aside in the second stanza would be a style choice. It's not necessary, but read the line out loud with the pause, and without, and then decide which you like better.
Gotta love the backwards acrostic.
Hope this helps!
Okay, I picked this up because it didn't have any reviews. {I know, it's such a bad reason!} *Hides face in shame* But this already intrigues me, and I haven't even read it yet. I love your set up. It looks very nice on the page without having too much of an unclear meaning.
I absolutely love that you did a backwards acrostic poem {Perhaps upside down?} *strokes beard thoughtfully*
...^I'm not even a boy. I don't know why I said I had a beard... Oh well. Back to reviewing!
In the first line of the second stanza, you need a comma after 'aside'.
In the first line of the fourth stanza, you might do better saying, "Even if this is the middle of destruction..."
Because it feels a lot like you're saying that the time you're writing about isn't destruction and the sunset is more beautiful during destruction periods.
In the first stanza, line five, I think it would read better if you had a colon instead of an exclamation mark. It wouldn't break it up so bad then.
And the third stanza, first line, did you want punctuation there?
Well, this is what I've seen. I really liked the way you wrote this! Like, an upside down acrostic? That's insane. I can't even write a decent normal acrostic!
Thank you so much for posting it for me to read. I really enjoyed it.
Oh, one last thing. The title. I'm not really sure how it ties into the poem.
NEVERMIND! You're a freaking genius. I love you.
But you spelled it 'faer' versus 'fear'. You're still a genius, though.
~Caeai
Thanks for your review! And Yes, I was quite proud of the title
I'll work on that punctuation.