Thank You For Leading Me

It was blinding as the strobes blasted through the space, our intoxicated states not bothered. Skin touched skin as space wasn't an issue at this hour. I had swigged the rest of my drink, I would tell you what it was, but I had no recollection of what I had ordered a few minutes ago. The music pounded against my ears, making it impossible to hear anything else. That was the point, right?

I stopped my dancing and started to push my way off the dancefloor, elbowing my way out against people. No matter how many 'thank-yous' I yelled, no one heard me anyway. Once I was off the dancefloor, I expected some air, but alas, there was just as many people just standing about and drinking. My mind was fuzzy as I stumbled my way to the bar. A beautiful girl with that perfect cat eye spotted me as I jumped up, getting to the front of the bar, managing to get around the crowd.

"Wanna drink?" She mouthed, pointing at my empty glass.

Nodding, I responded as loud as I could, "Tequila shot!"

She smiled, grabbing a shot glass and laced it with the booze. After a moment, she grabbed another one, must be pouring one for herself.

"I'll take one too!" She yelled.

I took one of the glass, clinking with her, tapping it against the bar and letting the alcohol fall down my throat. The liquor slithered through my body, leaving a warmth behind. I'd never take shots alone, but being drunk changes things... thought I didn't take it alone.

Placing the glass back down on the bar, I smiled at the bartender. "Thanks dude!" Some people pushed against me, but it seemed to be the least of my problems. All the alcohol helped block off a lot of things I wouldn't allow myself to be bothered with right now.

I had my card ready to give to the girl, but she shook her head. "On me, looks like you want to be fucked up."

"You’re not wrong." I slurred, turning back into the crowd.

Stumbling towards the dancefloor again, the anxiety set in. Where were my friends? Didn't I leave them by the stage? I took a look at my phone and saw a few texts, one of them saying that she was at the bathroom. I'll go there, at least I'll have one of my squad.

I slipped my phone back into my jean pocket, finding my way through the endless swarm of people. The bathrooms were downstairs... I followed the way passed the bar and into the hallway that lead to the front room. There were staircases leading up a floor or down, so I took the down, happy that there was less people swamping the space. The heels dug into my feet as I stepped down, making sure I wouldn't trip because of my blurry vision.

"Selina!" I heard someone yell, a familiar voice that sent my heart wild. It couldn't be...

Shaking my head, I kept walking, my hand on the rail. A few guys walked passed me, going back up with glassed eyes. The music seemed dimmer as I got lower, my ears felt so bruised form the sound.

"Selina, wait!" Again, him.

I stopped in my tracks and turned around, my stomach burning at its pit. Suddenly I was very aware of every sound, and if I looked drunk or not.

He was perfect that any person could explain perfect. Trust me, I wasn't the person to be like that. Love was foreign to me and I didn't believe in being with anyone for longer than a day. But every time I looked at him, I couldn't help the way he made my skin feel on fire. With his flawless blonde hair that looked like every fuckboy, and his piercing blue eyes, and yet, he could be even more perfect if you just looked down.

"What, dude?" I slurred, managing the most chillest response.

He came closer to me, dodging a few people. I could smell his cologne, but it lasted for a second before the stink if vomit reached us. We just had to talk when I was headed to the bathroom.

"I know we don't talk much, but I'm still human and... are you okay?" He asked, his voice raw.

"Why are you asking me this?" I replied.

I took a deep breath, unable to look away from his stare. He always managed to look at you as if he really cared, as if he was reading into your soul. All it did is make vomit ride up my stomach and my skin crawl. I thought I was over him, especially...

"You're drinking a lot Selina,"

"Why do you care, Will?" I huffed, finally looking away, watching people walk passed us.

He placed his hand on my arm, sending sparks up my arm and to my heart. I jumped, looking at him as heat rose in my cheeks. I thought I was over him.

"Why wouldn't I care?"

And this is the point where everyone, including myself would imagine him leaning in, and we'd kiss. Happily ever after. But I knew that was wrong, I was wrong. He didn't have anything for me, He didn't bite back. He led me on. He didn't know what he wanted... he was just being nice now, because I was drunk, I wasn't set right today.

"I'm fine Will, thanks though." I smiled, straightening my posture. "I'm just trying to forget for right now, and I know how picky you are even with your friends so, I recommend staying away, I have too many problems." Words flew out of me with ease, as if alcohol had no control, yet all of it.

He pulled back, his jaw dropped. "Selina, what? What do you mean?"

"Just, stay away from me, okay?" I huffed with a smile. "You led me on before, and I don’t want to think we will be friends again. 'Cause when we were friends you decided hitting on me was a good idea and then I was invested. I'm not able to do that again... I don't trust you."

I swallowed hard, watching his face drop, unable to form words. A group of girls walked by, eyeing him with lust beating off of them. Shaking my head, I turned around and proceeded to walk the rest of the steps down, and towards the bathroom, soberer than I was a few minutes ago.

"You're mad that I changed my mind?" Will asked from behind me.

"I'm mad you led me on!" I yelled, my heart racing. "You changed your mind? Yeah, okay Will. We all know you're so picky because you think you're so perfect. Or you're just that insecure with yourself! You led me on and all I wanted to be was friends with you!"

He huffed, running his hand down his face, unable to meet my eyes. "If you wanted to be friends with me, why did you bite back?"

"Because I did have a thing for you, stupid. But I never thought anything would happen, so I only thought we'd be friends. But then you started to do whatever you did, and that thing I had for you came back. Can you blame me?"

Before he could respond, I saw our friend come out of the boys' bathroom with the grandest smile on his face, that is, until he noticed us. His face dropped as he walked over, the highlight he had on popped as the lights hit his cheeks.

"Selina, Will, y'all okay? No lovers' quarrels okay?" He rolled his 'r' as he spoke.

"Stop it Mateo," Will huffed, looking at him. "Stop pushing this."

My heart sank, even though this wasn't news to me Suddenly I wanted to be every other girl in this club but me.

"Stop pushing what? And deny the chemistry that's around you two?" His brown eyes sparkled as he eyes the both of us.

Rolling my eyes, I rubbed my forehead, feeling the need for more alcohol. "Mateo, please stop." I begged, knowing this would hurt me and embarrass me more. The more he egged, the more awkward it'd get, he should know this.

"You're just a little bitch Will. There! I said it! Will is a little pussy." Mateo laughed, folding his arms over his chest.

A few people looked over at us, enjoying some drama for the night. Girls pushed passed me to get to the ladies' room just behind me. I folded my arms over my chest as well, feeling my defenses going down. Will had shrugged Mateo's words off with a short laugh, trying to gain some sort of man power.

"You won't admit it though," Mateo started again. "You're so picky on who you'd be with, as if you're perfect man. Look at her! She's perfect. She's broken, she's strong, she's beautiful. You don't know how lucky you are that she even wastes her time thinking about you. And you decide to like her for a second, and then not at all, because what? She didn't meet your standard?"

I felt heat rise to my cheeks again as I couldn't stand still, bouncing from one foot to the other.

"You can't make me like her just because she likes me." Will spat.

"That's not what I'm doing and we all know this. The friendzone doesn't exist. And we aren't forcing anyone on anyone just because one person likes another. It's okay to like someone that will not like you back, you get over it. What's not okay is to lead that person on."

Will looked cornered as he couldn't meet anyone's eyes, his arms crossed over his buff chest. I looked over at Mateo, noticing his piercing stare behind his glasses.

"Let's stop," I said, feeling my body shake. "Please, I'm done... I've been done for a while. I don't know why Will even brought it back up. Just, stop."

"I brought it back up?" He stared at me accusingly.

Tears brimmed my eyes. "You didn't lead me on... and we both know this, don't we? I just didn't meet your criteria... and that's sad, for you."