She Will Be Judged Chapter 2

Sunday mass was always at 7’O’clock, and the children absolutely hated to wake up at such an absurdly early hour of six. Maria was always awake at five, to give herself time to cook a good breakfast for her husband and five darling children; Daniel, Luke, Paul, Veronica and Elizabeth. It was always scrambled eggs, bacon and sausages with bagels. A filling meal, for a family filled with God’s spirit was Maria’s words. Maria adored her children. They were her life. They reassured her that she was carrying out her Lord’s wishes. She also gave herself time for Morning Prayer. Maria made sure she gave herself time to pray seven times a day.She'd pray before and after every meal, and before bed as well. It had been her routine since she was a little girl.

She knelt down beside the bed quietly, careful not to wake Joe.

She made a pedantic sign of the cross, cautious about whether she efficiently touched her shoulders and chest accurately enough to gain connection with God. She desperately hoped so.

“Lord, give me the strength to find the source of my horrible night terrors.”

She gasped lightly at her own concern.

“Forgive me if I have sinned; tell me what I can do to repent for whatever wrong I have done. I only wish to live in honour of you after all Father, my loving Father.”

“Look after my family, and all those who follow in your ways.”

“Bless you, Lord Jesus Christ and Father.

Amen”

She ironed her sons’ shirts and ties, and neatly unfolded her daughters’ below knee-length plaited dresses that had been neatly pressed in a bag, returned yesterday by the local dry cleaning lady. In the middle of her ironing, Joe came slumping tiredly down the stairs. “Morning sweetheart” Joe moaned, “morning my angel, have you prayed yet?” Joe came down behind Maria, and rested his hands on her shoulders massaging them. “Of course I’ve prayed. Would I fail you?” There was a peaceful silence yet again, in between the hissing of the iron as it pressed lightly against the clothes. But Maria started to shudder mildly, and warm up behind her eyes as if a build-up of tears needed to escape.

She stopped ironing. “What is it sweetheart?” He husband queried as he rest his hand on her shoulder lightly, The dream burned she thought. Abruptly she turned, to face her husband in angst, searching for an answer to a question he was unaware of. “Can you think of anything terrible I have ever done Joseph? Any sin I haven’t repented for?” Surprisingly amused, Joe retorted “No, I doubt you have done anything horrible. You are too good a person….however; you haven’t yet agreed to turn our pack of kids into an even six yet.” He smiled and winked. Maria did not relax; instead she maintained her expression of discomfort and worry, developing red patches on each side of her pale, bone cheeks. “I’m serious. And besides, you yourself are verging on sin by making such distasteful remarks.” She exited the room in an anxiously furious manner, abandoning Joe to his disappointment and embarrassment, no fun anymore he thought. Maria stomped up the stairs deliberately to alarm the children so they’d start to wake up.

She headed into Daniel and Luke’s bedroom first, knowing they’d be the most difficult to resurrect from the sleeping dead. She practically shoved the door open, and banged on a nearby metal lamp with the wooden spoon she held in her hand. “Wake up boys! Rise and shine! Church starts in 1 hour and a half!” they responded with dementedly slow tosses and turns and growl like moans of fatigue. “Can’t we stay in bed for just five more minutes?” breathed Luke dry mouthed. “ No, no, certainly not. It’s sinful not to attend church on Sunday, you know that. Get up.” Daniel sighed, and plunged the pillow into his face.

Maria left for the girls and Paul’s room. Daniel was the eldest, he was 18 and Luke was 16. They were both hit lookers in the Sunday gathering for youth society on Friday nights. This was pleasing to both Joe and Maria, because it would be easier for them both to find marriage. But Paul was different. He wasn’t as well built and confident as his brothers. He was pale and lanky, and preferred keeping to himself and mingling with his sisters and their friends, rather than seeking friends of his own. With other boys his age. Paul was Maria's greatest concern. He was 15, and shared a room with his sisters.

The breakfast table was wide and circular, taking up most of the dining room. There was one, silver glass chandelier hanging over the center, directly above the bible that was placed in the middle of the oak wood table. The bible always stayed at the table, for when Maria or Joe read out a significant passage from the gospel, a passage relevant to the family’s hopes and prayers. They would read it before breakfast, and discuss it at dinner, and any prayers that may have been answered through the day. Yesterday morning, Maria had read out a passage from the gospel of Matthew 4:1-11, which spoke of the time Jesus, was tempted by Satan in the wilderness. She had recited it many a time to the children, in an effort to remind them to always stay pure, and if tempted by desire, to always plead mercy to God. This was Maria’s favourite passage in the bible.

She was comforted by the strength of Jesus’ will to resist temptation; we are all ingrained with a fragment of the Lord’s will she pondered. That reassured her. When Maria was in strife, which was frequent, she would always pull out the passage and share it at the table. This morning, Maria took charge again, and preceded the breakfast with a reading. She raised herself from her seat, and eyed at her children with stern expectancy, directing them to join their hands. “I’d like to start today’s breakfast with the same passage that we read yesterday.” There was confusion and dismay among the family, Joe frowned with unease at Maria responsively. “Sweetheart, why don’t we begin with a different passage, the children know Ma-“ “No.” Maria cut Joe off almost aggressively and too abruptly. The children obediently kept their heads down.

Maria began twining and twisting her fingers together. Joe began again, slightly off guard “What is the importance of the passage Maria?” She stood stiffly, monetarily, only her bottom lip trembled. “I don’t think yesterday’s prayers were answered. We must ask for God’s guidance again.” She loosened the grip of her thumb on her forefinger, and sighed with relief, as though she had expelled herself from a dangerously confined space. Now the children were beginning to engage themselves in the conversation between Maria and their father. Paul got involved, and hesitantly raised his hand to speak, lightly pressing his finger against the air. Such a delicate boy.” Excuse me, Mom? What gives you the impression that our prayers haven’t been answered?” He looked up at Maria, somewhat panicky. This was evident in the excessive dilation of his pupils, under the minor glare of the dim light above, and the deep breaths he was inconspicuously inhaling and exhaling at a rapid pace, as if he was hiding fear... It was as if he had something to reveal, but couldn't express it.

Maria responded wearily, but with motherly distress, yet dismissive of his emotional dilemma “There has been a lot of tension within the family at the moment.” Maria couldn't speak of the dream specifically, it was too frightening. What if mentioning it somehow created even more horrific events?She might jinx her chance of safety and security. “What kind of tension are you talking about Maria?” Questioned Joe interrogatively, alarmed by her sudden major concern. “May I be excused?” questioned Paul, “I need to use the bathroom.” He went to hurry off, when Maria snapped in fury, swinging her hand out roughly, blocking Paul’s way. “NO! YOUR BREAKFAST IS GOING TO GET COLD! SIT DOWN!” Joe was frozen with shock, and Paul lowered himself down in retreat for safety, not taking one eye off of his angry angry Mother. The other children had remained obedient the whole time, cautious not to get involved in yet again one of her impulsive outbursts. What started as a quiet, plain peaceful meal had quickly turned into a climactic scenario. Maria took her seat, said grace to herself, and ignored what had happened. Just like last time.