Jerry

It’s a long drive to the border, lovely there. Nice and peaceful. I better pay more attention to the road so I don’t crash, I must stop letting my mind drift into limbo all the time. Thoughts are magic, but so is life. Carol, my wife. My darling wife sitting by my side in the front seat. Ahhh, she’s smiling at me, beaming with love. Her priceless, golden brown bob just serves as a delightful bonus to her star like appearance. She is like a thousand Meryl Streeps in one. Gorgeous.

We can’t be too far from the border now; I love my Carol’s tender touch, the softness of her skin is so soothing when she rubs my hand. My darling.

I remember the country club by the beach, the place where unity served its purpose at its best. Bringing my one true love and I together to venture through the maze that extraordinary unexplainable true love is.

A woman was dining at the round table, surrounded by old farts in suits and a couple of gowned up women. The one woman I eyed was the most distinctive looking of them all. Mother was beside me as I observed the woman. “Jerry!” I remember she exclaimed “enough snooping about, find Mummy a table.” I came back to reality and picked out the table, I selected the one that was two away from the stunning woman’s table. I had to be close to her.

The night was young, the lights were dim, and I felt her breath on mine

I kept glancing over at her that night, barely involved in the boring wealth based chitter-chatter. I only wanted to stare, analysing her every feature. Letting romance sugar coat my body with satisfaction. Eventually the woman noticed me looking at her, and she responded with flattery and flirting. We winked, blew kisses and laughed and blushed in response to each other’s attractiveness from a distance. Then later in the evening we danced like the Prince and Cinderella at the ball. Embracing her as we danced, I familiarised myself with her strawberry scent. Even now I tremble at the reminiscence of her saintly aroma.

The stench of the beach, the shattered shells that smear the seaside with sharpness and a salty stink

Oh! We’ve hit a bump on the road. Kids! Stop squealing! The children in the back squeal at every moment they get. Excitement is their motivation in life. But I suppose they are just children. Embracing innocence before it departs.

Line up Mummy, line up Daddy, kids come too, prepare for your doom.

“Quiet! Shut up!” I yell

If I don’t then they won’t ever learn discipline. It’s important for a child to know the meaning of right, wrong, appropriate and inappropriate. Carol sighs with relief at the sudden wave of silence that fills the car.

We took a little trip to the sea, sweet and sound, living a fantasy.

Jerry doesn’t know how to concentrate. It’s as if he wonders off into another world when he’s driving. Especially on sunny days like today! I can see him now, reminiscing about something beautiful, half-grinning in awe at the scenery perhaps. Clearly taken aback by the grape green oaks lined across the road on each side, swaying with the breeze. The organised flock of seagulls flying high in the sky, toward the cool air at the beach. Jerry and I met by the beach.

Stunted by her lust for my body, her need to hold me close.

We kissed in the shallows of the sea that night, strolled along the wet sand, hand in hand. I can still feel the rough sand trapped between my toes. Whoever knew such rough terrain could be so inviting, an ointment of endearment to my feet, the feet that journey me through life. Jerry stopped by the pier, held up my hands; “I love you” he voiced “with all the heart I can give.” And even though we’d only just met, I knew it was true, and we made love together by the rocks and the crabs’ abode.

Her touch was so poignant, stroking my legs, the waves splashing against my face, drenched with shame

Jerry is stopping the car now. He’s pulling up at a park by the road. The park is colourful, across from a street lined with shops. There are trees blooming cherry red apples, and maples in a bunch. Situated in the centre, are two tables where families can sit and endure the sweet serenity of the countryside.

One, two, three four five, up you go prepare to die.

Against a maple tree, not too far from the family sitting spot, is a man. Appears to be lonely. His hat tilted down toward the newspaper in which he has buried his nose in. How unfortunate a fellow he must be. Children! Leave your Father for Christ sake, why do they bother him so? He’s carrying all the food, while I carry the drinks. The supplies the children strongly desire, but no, they still attempt to climb on top of him to feed their entertainment.

Splish splash, one by one, down you crash and all tied up.

Same old Sunday. Boring headlines and a typical, utopian designed family are trotting about the park to munch on their freshly made sandwiches. I shouldn’t have retired from the cop shop last year. Oh and there is a weird young man skipping about like a Brady. So fake, what a pretentious bunch off monkeys they are. Oh look, another footballer has been caught doing drugs. Surprise surprise. Some kids have been shot, old lady got robbed. Same old human bosh bosh.

One good thing I can say is that it’s a marvellous day; the heat of the sun is relaxing. Especially since the shade is combined with the heat, the two complement each other very well, almost as if shade and heat create lukewarm weather. Haha. As intriguing as the article on speeding is, I’m finding the fellow across from me rather watch-worthy. What is he doing? He’s setting up for lunch?

I find myself secretly spying on the man, fascinated by his somewhat deranged behaviour. He looks familiar. Where have I seen him before? It’s on the tip of my temporal lobe.

“Carol” beams the man to thin air, “can you set up the places for the kids?”

Confused.

The upbeat family a table away from the man, move off with concern. Hushing their children up and practically scooping them up and running back to their car.

I watch with keen interest at this probably schizophrenic man. He’s speaking to no one, eating with no one, but smiling as if his life is complete and he is the happiest man in the world.

Funny.

“Detective Roberts, you see the paper today? Five people murdered. A family.” The chief voiced great tragedy, which meant a horrid case was about. I was swinging about in my spinny chair at my desk, rummaging through past documents on the worst offences. But I guess now they’d been updated. He handed the files down to me, “this is a nasty one detective; the family were found bobbing round like bottle tops in the ocean. One of the kids were half eaten by a sea creature of some sort.” I’d had so many child murders to deal with in my time that I was almost desensitised to the idea of a child being dead now. “Do we have a suspect?” I questioned the officer seriously.

He responded plainly “sure do detective, the guy obviously wasn’t all with it at the time of the murders; he left fingerprints all over the boat he hired to take out. He’s a youngish fellow, he’s bout 36 years of age. Has a history of being victim to domestic violence. His files say he was molested by his mother as a child, and on the….beach.” Chief coughed uncomfortably. “I’m guessing that might’ve served as some kind of motive for the murder.” breathed the Chief in distress.

The park is no longer bright with colour; the day has abruptly become dim. Black and white.

I recognise the man, he’s the guy. The deluded monster who took the lives off five people. His picture was all over the news last year. He must’ve had a good hiding spot, since none of us could find him. I cup my head in my hands, dropping my newspaper abruptly. Why did I retire last march? Lazy fuck. I should’ve kept up with the fucking case.

The man was still eating and laughing, and now moving onto the sweets. What, did he bake some goods too? I can only guess that he’s pretending to be eating with others.

Carol, my saviour. Kind and talented enough to bake some yummy goodies to take along the trip. My perfect wife. I lick my lips with pleasure “Mmmmm tasty slice honey”, my wife gawks at me embarrassed, I lay my hand on hers, “I love you sweetheart, and you my dear children.” The kids giggle, but resume with playing tag. I’m so lucky in love.

In love, in love, in love, in love. I’ll forever be in love. It has to be so, because then I’ll forget what I did to get where I am. Sometimes you’ve got to make sacrifice in order to get what you want….perfect everything….

One by one your bodies will drop; scream by scream your lungs will stop,

You’ll gasp for life, in fear and strife,

But no one will be able save you,

My Mummy loved me,

She really loved me

But she never cared to save me,

Your hands are tied, and so are mine,

Ad now my life will go on,

Take that Mummy

Now who is funny?

I have a life now to love,

There is only one of everyone,

And with you all dead

You’ll be mine to keep,

A lovely family of five,

They are all to be mine

I’ll treasure you

Keep you

Sink away sink away,

I watch you die with pleasure.

Love Jerry.