No daddy, I don't just decide "not to be happy."
But thanks for making me feel worse by suggesting that I do,
but one thing that you need to understand is that this isn't about you,
or mom, or my brothers, or my sisters,
or even the other dad that we never talk about who left me for another family.
But then again, it is about them.
More importantly, it is about me.
--
Oh, daddy, I wish you could chase this monster away like you used to chase the others,
you know, when I was young and they like to hide under my bed until I cried.
But this time, daddy, you can't make the monster run from me.
Because this time, daddy, the monster is me.
"There's nothing to be afraid of, baby."
God, daddy, there is everything to be afraid of!
This can't be fixed like the cars in your garage. I wish it could.
--
"I've never seen you cry, why are you telling me you're sad?"
Daddy, you never see it because I never cry in front of you.
There is a reason for that you know,
because I don't want to hear what you are saying right now,
"What did I do wrong?"
Damn you daddy! This isn't about you daddy!
This is about me trying to explain. But you're not stopping long enough to let me.
--
"Are you on drugs?"
No, are you?
"Why do you have such low self esteem?"
When was the last time you told me I was beautiful?
Or that you loved me?
Or that you were proud of me?
Don't remember? Neither do I.
--
I'm not trying to blame you, daddy, it's not your fault.
But you didn't help.
Neither did mom. Or anybody else.
Stop expecting me to be so happy daddy, then getting mad when I'm not.
It makes me feel worse, daddy.
I'm trying to explain my depression to you, daddy,
but you're not listening. Again.
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125,021 Literary Works • 672,740 Reviews
Honestly, I wanted to cry while reading this. I am currently going through the same situation but with my mom. Explaining depression to someone that does not have depression is difficult. Not all but some parents think when we say that something is wrong or if we need help they often think that we want attention. But they honestly don't get what we go through on a daily basis and then when we ask someone else that is not in the family for help cuz they are not listening they try to act like they wanted to help but they are only making it worse. Sorry, I had to get that out.
Hey.
This sounded like such a rap. And I love raps. This was awesome! Realistic, relatable, and true. The words and the flow is quite good. The efficiency of shifting paragraphs is good. And I suggest you should change the title.
The story line, it's nice, but I'd like it more if there was something else to it, let's say, a deeper view in the kid's story? Or her life or something? It would get the readers to care. And I honestly think that would make your composition much better.
The way you've used the word "daddy" again and again is amazing. Like, sometimes things like these become way too much and irritating but you used them in a sufficient manner.
Kudos.
Keep writing and stay blessed.
xoxo
This was so emotional. *tries to hold back tears* The story you tell is really impactful on the reader as they read in shock and pity, biting their nails for your fate. Depression is a growing problem for teenagers so I believe many people can, unfortunately, relate to this. What really makes the poem heart-slicing is that you use 'daddy'. The reader pictures the speaker having a young child's soul - weak and easily damaged. This person is trapped in a cage of despare with a dwindling hope as they continuesly shrink into a damaged oblivion. The impact that you create makes the message that is woven in all the more striking. Each line adds a deep breath of fear as the story is told and we are taught to listen to what people say not to interpret it into something else so we don't have to accept the terrible truth that lies around us - we as a society have stopped paying attention which is not right...
A beautiful, eye opening experience -Marshymallow
WOW! I totaly get it. I know its hard for others to get it. My family take my mental health probleams personalty. Great poem!
Brandi101 here for a review!
This poem was beautiful. I love the message that you are trying to send. And, I could tell that you put your heart into this piece. Sorry that this is such a short review, your poem literally left me speechless.
I look forward to reading more of your work.
Tigerlilly here for a review!
This was a really well written piece, and I love the structure you used to write it. I feel like this is very true in many situations; that parents do not seem to realize that they are hurting us simply by not listening. I think I really liked the repetition used in this poem. It has a strong beginning that hooks you in as well as a powerful ending, which are both important when writing. I can't really find anything that I would change. Its beautifully pieced together. Good job! Keep writing, I look forward to reading more of your works.
This was sssssso beautiful <333 Exactly how I feel to me and my dad!