Hey Em, why am I only seeing this now? Hooray I'm glad you've written a new work which I'm going to review for you.

My first impression after reading this was that it was a metaphorical piece of writing to highlight some current situations which still occur, particularly at parties for example. I really liked how you wrote in a way that was realistic and subtle, it had a cohesive flow too.

"Black blocks go whizzing past my head and I have no idea what happens to your mind when you get this wasted."

I think this suggested that the character might have taken drugs which made her start hallucinating and perhaps alcohol which got her intoxicated.

"I don't even know what the black blocks are? Can you tell me!"

Here, I would just swap the question mark to the end of, *Can you tell me?* And the exclamation point to, *I don't even know what the black blocks are!*

"Hey Ariel, wanna go down on me?!"

When I saw the name "Ariel" I automatically thought The Little Mermaid hehe, but I'm not sure if you intended the name to have any significance to the movie, might just be my Disney mind . If the name was somewhat intentional, I would interpret it in context to the movie - Ariel, being a mermaid would be naive to human nature and the intentions of a range of humans so she would be easily led astray to danger. Before I rattle on any further, I'll move on.

"That has to be the tenth invitation I've had this evening."

This line is implying that she became gradually "wasted" since she could keep her sanity to some extent to decline the ten invitations she previously had, or she could have accepted all those ten invitations so an eleventh wouldn't make much difference.

"But wait... what is he teaching me again?"

This line brought the whole narrative to realization, I assume she had been perhaps raped or abused in some way without noticing it because of her state - which she may or may not "remember that in the morning".

Overall - I really liked this heavy message you portrayed which people need to be aware of more, for their own safety. Keep writing! I hope this review was helpful.

--Chips

This piece is a little disorienting and confusing, but I can your character is intoxicated. If that confusion was what you were going for, then good job. I like this little snippet. You're character's voice comes through. I like the repetition of "I won't remember that in the morning." That line implies a lot when you follow it up with "ok for now" or "good." These actions are something your character wouldn't normally do. I still feel like I'm only getting half the story. You've intrigued me and it would be interesting to see you expand the story to the aftermath of this incident.

EmeraldEyes, nice to see you., you haven't been online much, I was worried you'd dropped out. Glad to see you hadn't, I nearly jumped for joy when I saw that you were still on.

This piece was clearly confusing, it gave me a mixed up feeling. Black and white blocks that change colors? A man telling you to strip and you call him your teacher? It doesn't really sound like clarity to me, you'll probably have to explain to this little eight year old.

I only had one little nitpick. These sentences seem a little strange with the punctuation that they're given, maybe you could change it somewhat? Switch those marks around and you'll be great.

"I don't even know what the black blocks are? Can you tell me!"

This was really effective and mysterious. I think you can be a great writer of the century, if you keep publishing. So follow your dreams and keep being awesome!

-wisegirl22