Young Writers Society

Hi! I love PJO so yeah I love this! I like the way you really characterized Ethan in a way that's not just him brooding about how awful his life ended up, it was kinda him accepting what his fate was, at least I think so? Anyways, I would like to say that I really like the beginning, from "an eye for an eye" and "traded my sight for revenge" as that was a really good use of expanding an idea and relating later lines in poetry with each other.

The only part I'm vaguely perplexed about is the formatting of the poem itself, as I was thrown off by the capitalization of "from" and "about" even though previously the last lines had more punctuation and ended the lines before starting another one. I'm also confused about the varying lengths of the lines, going from "I would've seen..." to "too late now," since I thought every line would be more even, especially as those lines are separate from each other.

I liked that some of this definitely seems to rhyme after every other line, even though other lines don't really rhyme at all. Overall, I really like this, with the descriptive words and details and I really liked the bittersweet reflection at the bottom of the poem too, cause that's a very empowering action, to admit your mistakes. And yeah this was really good!
I hope you have a great day!

Woah, I love this poem! You've summed at Ethan's story and character in literally just twelve lines. Ignore this suggestion if you like because it's poetry, but I think 'I would've saw his evil intentions' should say 'I should've seen his evil intentions'. Because of correct tenses and all that. My favourite part is 'but I've learned a lesson from Luke Castellan'. It's amazing that you managed to make his name rhyme with something. Love it!