The roads leading to my neighboring houses
are like the the branches of a tree,
and they talk like the baby birds chirping on the nests.
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138,256 Literary Works • 672,091 Reviews
Hey,
I enjoyed this poem. This poem painted a picture in the mind. I can picture someone living out in the country and to get to their neighbors house, it is a long winding road just like a tree branch can be. I can hear the way they talk, constantly, non stop. Good job. I am not sure if that is what you where after, but I love it either way. Very short and to the point.
Heya, DreamWork
This poem is very short- that doesn't mean it's a bad poem c: Length isn't an issue when it comes to poetry, so you're safe there.
I love your use of imagery here, and how contrasted they are. The first is a cliche, the second one isn't. In fact, the third line is probably my favorite because you managed to find a new way to picture it. It's orignal and creative, and I think it works well with the previous line.
I think the next best thing about this is how subtly powerful this is. It's just one single idea, you threw it at the table and went out, so it was the only thing we focus on.
So, kudos to you c:
Keep on writing.
Cheers!
Alpha
Wow, for and haiku with the syllables all screwed up , this is pretty good. There's not much I can say on it sadly, but hey, love it. I would just like to say, that it is an original and lovely poem that shows what haikus were originally made for. Nature.
~The dark one.
Maybe I'm too stupid to understand what you mean .
._.