Audy

Hey Eternalrain! I think you meant to say "arose" at the end, instead of "aroused" ;) I might suggest to get rid of the "stick to match" line as well. ...

Hey Epicnumber1! This poem is all about rhythm and meter and I think that for the most part it really does read and flow smooth. There's a lightness and a ...

Swiftfurthewarrior! Cool poem! The poem seems to be the actualization of the writing of this poem which was cool to see in someone so young. It's like the speaker sits ...

Tigerlily, I wish there was more of this poem. I like cats and they're not often described or used as metaphors for poetry or language or words at all, so ...

Hey Authorian, I understand the concept of the poem as this sort of back and forth dialogue that the speaker has with him/herself. There's the thing that is hurting and ...

Burrow, I like the way the lines are fragmented—cut, even—suggests a nice tie-in to the theme in a form and function sort of way. In that second stanza, I suggest ...

Magpie, Gorgeous, gorgeous poem. So much feels in it ~ :c Suggestions to take with a grain of salt, which are mostly stylistic and aesthetic in nature: 1.) I want ...

Tiffanytoy, Your first two lines are full of action and imagery: a knife, a slice, subject+verb, these are some quick lines! Because the lines are so quick, it works to ...

Tigerlily, The poem seems to be a dialogue in an empty space. Two people, where the "you" tries to convince the "I" not to kill herself, and the moment where ...

Pomp! c: I love this poem! There is just so much beauty here, it hardly seems monotonous at all, and yet, it's the voice that does it. There's so much ...

Fort. That title

CardinalSouth! There is a lot of control for rhyme and rhythm, sure enough I went and counted and each line is almost exactly ten syllables ;) I appreciate that, but ...

Royalhighness! :) Good luck with uni!

Skydreamer, Terribly sorry, I'm going to have to make some assumptions here. ;) Your writing gets better and better. This one is crystal clear and the movement from thought to ...

Indrashish! The rhyming throughout here seems contrived, especially the earths/dearths, ate/hate. Yes, it provides a lyricism, but it's like hearing Mary had a little lamb over and over again to ...