Pickle In The Matrix
A tightly closed jar, a home you say?
It is merely a tool to keep the smell at bay.
This poor green pickle,
much bigger than a nickel.
Trapped forever in the glass,
forced against its own great mass.
The rancid liquid in its cell,
forever causing it to swell.
How unfortunate its life may seem,
but after all, it could be a dream.
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139,319 Literary Works • 672,529 Reviews
Hi, J here for a review
I have never seen the Matrix movies but I know some about them. In the little I know about them I have never heard of the floating pickle. It posed a bunch of questions, which is very effective in keeping the poem alive. There was no grammar mistakes that I could see so great job with that. But also good job keeping the poem to where people who haven't seen Matrix can enjoy it to.
The best part of your poem was the first two lines, they were strong and set the pace perfectly.
Thanks for the poem and I believe I will go review The Broken China Doll.
Good Job and Keep Writing!!
There is no pickle in the matrix movies. I just made it up and told what a pickle would be like in the matrix.
Hi again, Lolosboing.
I just reviewed The Broken China Doll and I must say I hadn't realized you were the author of this poem as well. It's so much more concise and effective.
I saw all the Matrix movies and I'm not sure I understand who the pickle is supposed to be. Is it a human in the Matrix, living a dream life and floating peacefully? Or is it a 'free' human barely surviving in the crush of an overpopulated secrete city? I suspect it's the first but admit that the other one sucks just as much.
I will at least look at pickles differently now. And I especially liked the first two lines of your poem. They were perfect, they set the pace just perfectly.
I just think there are two typos: "it's cell" shoul be "its cell" and "it's life" should be "its life".
Thanks for the poem.
Oh! I'm so stupid! Why didn't I catch that! Thanks!