This letter was for you
but I have nothing left to say,
ever since you went away.
This letter was never for you,
it was for that part of me that went too.
Give me my words back, set me free.
Give my my words back, just let me be.
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139,524 Literary Works • 672,598 Reviews
Hello, Subtle here for a review on review day!
This is a really wonderful short poem, though simple. It really speaks out to the readers. This is a pretty nice twist on the usual topics, so I praise you for that. Since this is a pretty short poem, I will give you a line by line analysis.
I loved the first two lines, I have nothing to nitpick about them. However, I felt as if you should continue the last line. Went away to where?
A nice correspondence for the first stanza, and I really like the second line. Is very melancholic and beautiful at the same time.
I love the repetition of 'Give me my words back', it really stresses out how much you want them back. Though I think you misspelt the first my in the last line, is meant to be a 'me'. I like this ending, because is powerful in a really gentle way. Like you're tired, but you're desperate and you just want to be free of it all. I really like this poem, and the idea of it.
Keep on writing, Sophie!
-S.s
Hello thank you for your detailed review!
Ah yes you caught my typo.. I'll change it right away!
Thanks, I'll pick up a pen right away..
Hello, I'm Demoness, welcome to YWS by the way!
I like the simplicity of this piece, al though I think it could have more depth. As it is, it's pretty plain- not much imagery which doesn't really give it personality. Try rewriting it more colorfully, giving each line more character.
When it comes to grammar and punctuation I think your up to it though, and the rythm and flow works good too!
Hope this was helpful and for my grading I'll give you 3/5 icky sticky spiders served on a silver platter
Good Luck & Keep Writing
// Saga Le Demon
Hello!
I will certainly try to take up your suggestions.
Thanks!
Wow, this is amazing.
I can really relate to what you're writing about, which could be part of the fact why I like it so much!
So, writing!
The rhyming is well done and helps the poem move along well which is obviously good.
My favourite part was the final lines as they just held so much meaning and I especially like how you repeated it and kept it the same until the last few words where it rhymed so that kept it similar too!
I apologise, I can never find mistakes in your work, keep up the fabulous work!
Ahhh hello
Thanks so much, it really means a lot
<3
You are such a good writer though! :O
Says you! I loved your last haiku. I still reread it a lot
Oh my Lord that is so awesome! I feel so special now ^-^ But sorry.. Which poem? xD But you're seriously great, I swear you've been here for like a second and already had like four works in the Spotlight! xD