Tis the season to remember this wonderful YWS piece of history. @Snoink
By Snoink and Grif
~
Characters:
Snoink
Griffinkeeper
Bella
Edward
Incan
Craig Ferguson
Teague
Author
PenguinAttack
Random Kittens
Bulbasaur
Plot: Edward and Bella come over at Snoink and Grif’s house for Halloween.
Scene: Inside Snoink and Grif’s house. Snoink is passed out on the floor in a sugar-induced hysteria. Grif watches, helpless.
GRIF: I hope that Edward and Bella don’t...
BELLA & EDWARD: TRICK OR TREAT!
GRIF: Sorry, Snoink ate all the candy.
GRIF: So what are you?
EDWARD: I’m a vampire.
GRIF: You don’t look like a vampire. You need a better costume.
BELLA: I’m a ballerina!
SNOINK: I’M A LIZARD!
INCAN: I am CHIA PET!
EDWARD: That’s... very... nice.
BELLA: I’M CLUMSY!
EDWARD: I MUST PROTECT HER!
SNOINK: I MUST PROTECT... YOUR FACE!
GRIF: WHY ARE WE SHOUTING?
INCAN: WE’RE NOT SHOUTING, WE’RE TALKING IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS.
GRIF: How does that all work out?
SNOINK: Manatee rhymes with Humanity!
CRAIG: Does that remind you of anybody...
TEAGUE: OMG! CRAAIIIG!
BELLA: I’M CLUMSY!
BELLA: OUCH!
SNOINK: I SPEAK IN ALL CAPS!
GRIF: Wait! What’s the point of this?
AUTHOR: Um...
GRIF: Wait, I’m the author.
AUTHOR: No you aren’t.
GRIF: Yes I am!
SNOINK: I’M A LIZARD!
AUTHOR: No you aren’t.
GRIF: Yes I am!
SNOINK: I’M A LIZARD!
AUTHOR: No you aren’t.
GRIF: Yes I am!
SNOINK: I’M A LIZARD!
AUTHOR: No you aren’t.
GRIF: Yes I am!
SNOINK: I’M A LIZARD!
AUTHOR: No you aren’t.
GRIF: Yes I am!
SNOINK: I’M A LIZARD!
AUTHOR: No you aren’t.
GRIF: Yes I am!
SNOINK: I’M A LIZARD!
EDWARD: This plot sucks.
TEAGUE: DUDE. This story has CRAIG FERGUSON IN IT. And it has a better plot than Twilight.
BELLA: I’M CLUMSY!
EDWARD: Yeah, but I scintillate.
SNOINK: Ooooooooh. It’s Christmas time! SHINY.
INCAN: See? Talking in all caps.
BELLA: OH MY GOSH, I LOVE EDWARD CULLEN HEART HEART LOVE LOVE ALL MY SOUL HEART LOVE EDWARD CULLEN.
PENGUINATTACK: HAHAHA! NOW MY PENGUINS SHALL EAT YOU ALL UP!
ALL: OH NOES, A PENGUIN ATTACK!
EDWARD: Yeah... our story totally has a better plot.
TEAGUE: You suck.
BELLA: HE IS SCINTILLATING!
TEAGUE: Yeah... you suck too.
SNOINK: He is making fun of our story, Griffypoo!
GRIF: Uh... don’t call me that.
SNOINK: Avenge me!
BELLA: I’M CLUMSY!
AUTHOR: Okay... that’s enough. THE EN--
RANDOM KITTENS: What did we learn on the show tonight Craig?
TEAGUE: ZOMG! ZOMG! ZOMG! CRAIG!
BULBASAUR: Bulba bulba bulbasaur!
TEAGUE: Shut up, you! Anyway, Craig, why didn’t you ever read my email?
CRAIG: Um...
AUTHOR: --D!
This was hilarious! Oh boy, where do I start? Is it the fact that Bella’s love (excuse me, obsession) is on point? Or the fact that the Author (whoever they are) is a different person? Maybe how Snoink’s declaration of being a lizard brought tears to my eyes? Or how this is a far superior, more meaningful plot than Twilight ever could be? This Halloween story was so lovely, so amazing, that it brings Halloween itself to shame. Great job. I wish you a wonderful day free of Edward Cullen and Bella Swan.
Loved it!
"WE’RE NOT SHOUTING, WE’RE TALKING IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS." was my favorite part along with. "OH MY GOSH, I LOVE EDWARD CULLEN HEART HEART LOVE LOVE ALL MY SOUL HEART LOVE EDWARD CULLEN." Made me laugh so hard, and it probably doesn't help that I'm on a sugar high. LOVED IT!!! So happy I found this, can't wait to read what your write next.
Carpe diem,
LUNARGIRL
This is certainly a classic and I am glad to have discovered it while browsing through the delights of "2008 YWS". I'm hoping more people can appreciate it over this Halloween holiday season.
Does anyone know why this doesn't appear in the 100 YWS Spotlight Works of All Time though? If works prior to 2009 don't show up, what other gems are hiding out there? I'm very curious...
Really, this piece has not aged a bit - the line about Bella continually yelling "I'M CLUMSY" is hilarious - it cracks me up every time I read it.
Well done!
WE’RE NOT SHOUTING, WE’RE TALKING IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS.
OMG! I was literaly on the floor laughing.
*My dad enters the room.* "You need to quiet down."
xD You get a gold star, but if it were in my power, you would recieve twenty. 
Epic! Utterly epic! It literally had me rolling on the floor laughing my brains out while my sister watched me and debated whether or not to get help! 
And CRAIG FERGURHSON! I LOVE HIM! Too bad he was petrified but hey HE WAS THERE!!
Plus, I loved the sugar hysteria and everything falling on Bella E-P-I-C F-U-N-N-I-N-E-S-S! 
Your awesome! -Irish
LMAO!
I can't pick a fave part...
They were all just that hilarious...
**stars**
Epic win, m'dear.
Flute Loops
Genius. Totally genius. I love how you mutilated Bella; I always hated her. And the plot is SO better than Twilight's. 
You guys are brilliant. Thanks for making me smile.
BELLA: OH MY GOSH, I LOVE EDWARD CULLEN HEART HEART LOVE LOVE ALL MY SOUL HEART LOVE EDWARD CULLEN.
<Antartica falls on Bella>
Doesn't get much better than this.Hello! I've already given you a star. Have another!
Having read Twilight, this has become hillarious on a whole new level. But I am in love with Edward.
Anyway - bring on a Christmas version! With more Bulbasaur, of course
OMG! That was my birthday! Ridiculous! Why didn't I read this before!
I love it SO MUCH! (I'm talking in ALL CAPS not screaming!)
Favorite Part: PENGUIN ATTACK
OH NOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Definitely gold star!
~jumper
summergrl13 wrote:Don't get confused now Snoink. You're not a lizard; just look at your avatar, it's a pig!
Clearly, candy makes people believe themselves to be lizards... but mostly it makes Snoink believe that.
Well, I have to say that Bella is pretty well summed up in this script. Can't really get more descriptive than, "I'M CLUMSY!"
Great job Snoink. Again!
0(o.o)0
Don't get confused now Snoink. You're not a lizard; just look at your avatar, it's a pig!
Clearly, candy makes people believe themselves to be lizards... but mostly it makes Snoink believe that.
Well, I have to say that Bella is pretty well summed up in this script. Can't really get more descriptive than, "I'M CLUMSY!"
Great job Snoink. Again!
0(o.o)0
*Falls into fits of helpless giggle snorts* Awesome!!!!!!
*Giggle snorts even harder*Antarctica falls on BELLA
yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
that seriously killed me!!!!!!
I`m gonna go crash into a tree now!!!
(Psstt!!! that meant she liked it!!)
LOL that was hilarious! Everything that fell on Bella made me laugh! Antartida, that was a great one! Not screaming just capital letters xD
My favorite part was:
EDWARD: Yeah, but I scintillate.
<Edward scintillates>
SNOINK: Ooooooooh. It’s Christmas time! SHINY.
I really like the detail you put in the script and also the charters in the script it was very good for your age and also keep writting i really like reading this piece and i really enjoy it too.
*Rolls eyes* This was so random yet so funny.
I loved how you made fun of Bella.
Weeeee ballerina!!! Hahahahahahahah.
Good job.
Nariel
*GOLD STAR*
EDWARD: Yeah, but I scintillate.
<Edward scintillates>
EPIC WIN!
(and I was shouting by the way)
Edit: You know what I find interesting? That the part that most people (like me) found funniest is actually from the book.
Wow, you just made my day. It was so random, but in a good way.
WHY ARE WE YELLING?
WE'RE NOT. WE'RE JUST TALKING IN CAPITAL LETTERS.
That has to be my favorite part.
OMG! That was hilarious. Everyone was looking at me like I was crazy.
*sniffs* you just HAD to make fun of Bella.
You could so make a career out of making movie spoofs.
...And here I was wondering what Snoinkus thought of Twilight....
GO Edward!!! * Dazzles *
Random Kittens !!!
See Snoink---you love kitties after all!!!!!!!!!!
Can we have a Christmas special too and a everyday special episode!
My dad told me to shut up, because it's late and I was laughing so loud, it woke up my little brother. That was the funniest thing since my best friend ran into a locker On the first day of school.
Love it, love it!!!!!!!!!! LOL
I loved edward going "I MUST PROTECT HER" That was just stephenie meyer perfect! Great great great!
I wish my mad mind could be as creative as yours
"I'm a ballerina" weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Liked it mucho
Sarah
xxx
I fell out of my chair, I was cracking up so hard. I love the parts where Bella declares herself clumsy and something falls on her....
Its GREAT
This is the third most popular piece on YWS since we started doing gold stars? Goodness...
Haha . How dare Bella and Edward make fun of your story Snoink. It's better than theirs...
It's truly amazing . Nobel-Prize winning stuff.
-Stel x
Too.Much.Laughter.Cannot.Breathe.
*face turns red, then blue, then purple*
I agree with EmmaSweetie!
Excellent Job!
You get a gold star 
I loved it!!!!!!!! ahh even though i am a twilight fan, it was perfect!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*jumps to feet and applauds*
I just had to read this out loud to my sister. It was wicked. Wicked awesome. We were rolling. On the floor.
--Anna
O_O
*bursts out laughing*
LOL That WAS SO FUNNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Srsly?
Hey wait a minute....your makign fun of Twilight! *points accusing finger at writers*
Oh well.....it was FUNNY!
toodles, jen!
I just cried from laughing so hard.
That has never happened before.
*dies of laughter*
Two words: LOVE IT. It's pure genius.
Fav part:
Snoink wrote:
EDWARD: Yeah, but I scintillate.
<Edward scintillates>
SNOINK: Ooooooooh. It’s Christmas time! SHINY.
EDWARD: I MUST PROTECT HER!
SNOINK: I MUST PROTECT... YOUR FACE!
GRIF: WHY ARE WE SHOUTING?
INCAN: WE’RE NOT SHOUTING, WE’RE TALKING IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS.
EDWARD: Yeah, but I scintillate.
<Edward scintillates>
Snoink wrote:Completely random, pointless works are rarely interesting except for the, "Look at how silly I can make something!" factor. Which is akin to navel-gazing. Stop it.
Epic win, my friend. Epic win.
My favorite part was Edward scintillating. I started laughing at that point and didn't stop.
Two other moments of distinction:
The black hole falling on Bella and her all-caps declaration of love for Edward. Seriously, that's the entire plot of their series.
I enjoyed the third party "author".
In fact, I enjoyed the whole thing. I do wish that Charlie had a speaking part though.
Epic, epic win.
*thumbs up*
~GryphonFledgling
This was epic and it deserves a gold star!
I needed a good laugh and this one had me literally falling out of my chair. I LOVED THIS AND I AM NOT SCREAMING, JUST TALKING IN CAPS
Favorite part:
GRIF: Wait! What’s the point of this?
AUTHOR: Um...
GRIF: Wait, I’m the author.
AUTHOR: No you aren’t.
GRIF: Yes I am!
This is too good for words!
Haha, I can't stop laughing! Thanks for the awesome-ist B-Day present (although I know it wasn't intended for me!).
Epic Win!
My Favorite Part:
BELLA: OH MY GOSH, I LOVE EDWARD CULLEN HEART HEART LOVE LOVE ALL MY SOUL HEART LOVE EDWARD CULLEN.
<Antartica falls on Bella>
PENGUINATTACK: HAHAHA! NOW MY PENGUINS SHALL EAT YOU ALL UP!
ALL: OH NOES, A PENGUIN ATTACK!
EDWARD: Yeah... our story totally has a better plot.
There was a significant lack of Bulbasaur that I find appalling. I demand more Bulbasaur. MOAR!
Loller coaster!
Epic genius. You both are my hero(s).
HEART HEART LOVE LOVE ALL MY SOUL HEART LOVE
~ Jabber ~
Oh. My. Gosh. I think my IQ just went down 10 pts, but it was totally worth it. My favorite partwas this:
EDWARD: I MUST PROTECT HER!
SNOINK: I MUST PROTECT... YOUR FACE! (haha!!
GRIF: WHY ARE WE SHOUTING?
INCAN: WE’RE NOT SHOUTING, WE’RE TALKING IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS.
Haha !
This seriously had me cracking up a bunch of times
Well done, hee hee
Xxx
Really? My favorite part?
INCAN: WE’RE NOT SHOUTING, WE’RE TALKING IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS.
GRIF: How does that all work out?
I'm not sure if it's your literary genius that has me laughing, or the aftereffects of a sugar high that have me laughing so hard.
Look! It's the choo-choo shoe, Charlie! Ooooh!
LOL!
Hilarious. Absolutely brilliant.
Apparently you are a Lizard, snionk.
Go the random kittens!
120,208 Literary Works • 649,086 Reviews
Points: 144125
Reviews: 1227
Donate