The Progeny : Chapter 11 (Revised)

by MissGangamash

Published December 17, 2014

12+ Violence

In The Progeny (Novel)

Chapter 11

Do what you have to do to get us there. No matter what. That was what Evie had told Caius. And that’s exactly what he did.

Caius sneaked up behind Mark and broke his neck with Evie still hidden behind the double doors, watching through the crack. He then used his impressive vampire speed to get to the guard by the doors leading to the new-borns. He stopped in front of him and made eye contact. Due to the close range- almost nose to nose- the guard was under his spell in seconds.

“Kill your guard friend then close your eyes and don’t move until some tells you to. Forgot my face.” Tears brimmed in the guard’s eyes as he turned and shot the remaining guard in the chest. Blood splattered up the door and Evie jumped behind it at the sound of the gun shot, biting down on her fist to stop from screaming. Her heart was pounding like a jackhammer in her chest and the scream that she was biting back felt like a physical lump lodged in the back of her throat.

“Evie,” Caius called and she came out, her trembling hand over her mouth and tears brimming her eyes. He grabbed her other hand and pulled her along the corridor and up the stairs. She stumbled after him. The guard that had just killed his friend rested against the wall, shaking with his eyes sealed shut.

Evie yanked Caius back when they reached the top of the stairs. “There’re four men at the front doors.”

Caius nodded, his expression hard and determined. “Stay here.”

He let go of her hand and became a black blur as he sped down the hall. Evie watched, her eyes wide and body convulsing with tremors as Caius broke one of the guard’s necks and used the other as his puppet to kill the two guards outside.

When only one man remained standing, Caius gestured her to follow him. She did, veering slightly and almost knocking against the wall as her legs threatened to give out from under her. She gave the last guard a fearful look as he stood facing the stairs, his eyes vacant yet beading with tears.

“Don’t worry about him. He’ll distract anyone who follows us,” said Caius and took her hand again.

They ran down the curving stairs and onto the driveway. The cold night air stung Evie’s cheeks and made her rushed, ragged breathes scratch against her throat. Caius studied the distance they had to cross to get to the gates. The sky was black but the driveway was lit with garden lamps like a runway. They both jumped, wincing and cowering from the ear-splitting screech of the alarm. Caius jerked into motion and touched Evie’s shoulder, making her flinch and bring her attention back to him. “Climb on my back.”

Evie nodded and he bent down to her height so she could wrap her arms around his neck. He hoisted her up and she gripped his sides with her thighs.

Bile rose in her throat as he used his vampire speed, slicing through the air like a bullet from a gun. She had closed her eyes and pressed her face into his back but she could feel her body shifting inhumanly fast, and it sent her head whirling.

She screamed into his back and clung to him with her life when gunfire filled the air. But the rapid succession quickly ended with the distinctive sound of the cracking of bones. Caius suddenly came to a stop and screeched, an unholy sound of agonising pain. He stumbled backwards and she lost her grip on him. She dropped flat on her back, the force of the fall knocked the wind out of her and jolted her bones. Feeling light-headed from the impact and motion sickness, Evie curled onto her side and vomited.

She wiped her mouth and looked up at Caius who was staring down at his burning palms. “Silver,” he hissed.

She gulped and looked to the gates, standing huge and ominous before them. In front of it lay two armed guards, their heads twisted at obscure angles.

Fear coiled around Evie, making her shake and curl her fingers into her pyjama sleeves. She was gasping her breath, her cheeks wet and chin trembling. “What are we going to do?” The lump in her throat made her voice come out hoarse.

Caius set his jaw and curled his burning hands into fists. “Get back on my back.”

She stumbled to her feet and climbed back onto him. He stood there for a moment, sizing up the gate before…

The sounds emanating from her Maker made Evie cringe as if the pain was shared as Caius climbed the gate despite the way it was burning through his skin, tearing flesh from his palms. When he jumped down on the opposite side, he crumbled to his knees, trembling and crying with agony. Evie dropped to his side, tears blurring her vision.

Blood smeared Caius’ face. He had his palms out in front of him, his whole body convulsing. The look of his blistered palms made Evie gag. Most of the skin on his palms and fingers was missing, revealing raw redness underneath. And the smell of the chard flesh that hung off in strips was even more vile.

Evie scrambled to her knees and crawled over to him. They both watched as the bloody, oozing red blisters on his hands started to heal over, slowly knitted back together.

A thunderous bang made them both turn back to the mansion. Black silhouettes of people were filing out of the front doors. Tires squealed as cars made messy turns, heading straight for them.

“Time to go.” Caius jumped to his feet and grabbed hold of Evie’s arm, slinging her onto his back like a backpack.

She clung onto him, her thighs trembling from fear and exertion she gripped them around his thin waist. Her eyes were sealed shut. Her teeth gritted to hold back her cries.

Evie’s stomach rolled as the ice cold wind whipped across her, making the loose sleeves of her pyjama top and bottoms erratically slap against her skin so hard it stung.

In a matter of minutes, Caius was dropping Evie in their hallway safe and away from the chaos. She stumbled, her head reeling, and bashed into something hard. Arms wrapped around her and held her close. “Whoa, are you okay?”

She curled her fingers into Caius’ tattered tunic and gulped down the bile that rose in her throat. Her fear made her feel delicate. As if Caius’ hold on her could so easily crack her like a china doll. Her nerves were shot and the pulse of her racing heart was thumping almost deafening loud in her ears. “Is the door shut?” she managed to whisper, hoarse and broken.

“Yes. Don’t worry.” He smoothed down her hair. “Did you give them your name?”

She shook her head. “Just Evie but I gave him yours to find you.”

“That shouldn’t be a problem. The house is under your alias anyway.”

“They won’t find us?” Her voice was shrill and desperate.

“No. They won’t find us,” he replied softly and pressed his lips to the top of her head. A long silence followed where Evie stayed enveloped in Caius’ arms, feeling too fragile to hold but also to terrified to be let go. All she could hear was her heart pounding. That thing that wasn’t there before. That thing that she was starting to get used to now, despite everything, she was starting to grow quite fond of it.

“Thank you for saving me,” Caius finally broke the silence, brushing his lips across her forehead. He was hard and solid as he held her, his voice low.

“It’s not like I had a choice.” She looked up into his pale blue eyes. Bloody tracks ran down his cheeks from old tears and blood was still mangled into his growing beard. “You are my everything.”

He smiled, a motion that used every muscle in his face and caused the blood tracks to crack and flake away. He slipped his hands from her back to behind her head, cupping it. He tilted her face up so it was aligned with his. “I don’t ever want to be apart from you ever again. I love you so much.”

A lump swelled in her throat and the backs of her eyes burned. “I love you, too.” She lifted herself up onto her tiptoes and pressed her forehead against his. They both closed their eyes at the contact and exhaled a relieved sigh. Caius’ skin was so cold against hers. Like stone. “We still have a few blood bags in the fridge. Do you want one?”

He shook his head. “No. I’m fine.” Before she had a chance to insist, Caius’ lips were on hers. She moaned softly into his mouth and melted into him, her hands slipping up to his neck. She pushed him back, suddenly getting a surge of life pouring through her – of relish. They were alive. Both of them, alive. And together again. No barriers separating them. No Nico looming over them.

Evie pinned him up against the door, her body now trembling for a different reason. The buzz of adrenaline hummed through her veins and made her face hot. He laughed at her forcefulness and deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring hers. She smiled against his lips and pushed off what was left of his blazer.

Caius’ hands slipped under her pyjama shirt and gripped onto her sides, her skin burned at his cold touch. She messed her fingers in his hair and pulled him down to her height. The kiss was perfect, frivolous and passionate up until a sharp pain sliced through her and she squealed, pushing him off her. Caius gasped as their lips broke contact. His eyes widened and he covered his fangs with his hand.

Evie stepped back and put her finger to her tongue. “Woo yust wit me,” she slurred out after seeing blood on her fingertips, her eyes wide with shock.

Caius gulped and retracted his fangs. “I’m sorry.” His eyes shifted to their kitchen. “Maybe I should have a blood bag.”

Evie stared down at her bloody fingertips. At her human blood that looked so much like her old dead, vampire blood, but was entirely different.

She was alive and Caius was undead.

The sudden, daunting realisation of how severe that difference actually was had Evie so shaken it felt like her lung had just collapsed in on themselves and the whole world spun around her. Fearful of alarming Caius, who was still stood before her, touching his own lips with an apologetic stare.

“I’ll be in bed,” Evie said quickly before turning and heading up the stairs.

Evie closed all the shutters upstairs before stripping out of the god awful pyjama’s Nico had given her and replacing them with her own. It was then she realised she no longer had the set of keys. She must have dropped them in the hurry to escape.

Her adrenaline seemed to have worn off and exertion had taken its place. She sank under the familiar covers and closed her eyes, unable to stay awake for Caius. In the silence, her heartbeat was the only sound. She sank her teeth into her bottom lip and clung to her vest at her chest. The image of her tearing her way through her own ribs to snatch that beating sack and throwing it across the room had Evie’s emotions running wild. Her breath hitched and her eyes flitted in the darkness. She didn’t want to lose that constant thump in her chest, the feeling of warmth and cold on her skin, even the way her terror altered her breathing and made it hurt.

Her head pounded at the dizzying shifts of her own psyche and the exhaustion of trying to somehow make sense of them sent her into a deep, well-need sleep.

She roused a little later at the sound of running water. Wiping the crust from her eyes and the drool that had leaked down her chin, she sat up and peered into the bathroom. The door was slightly ajar and she could see movement behind the steamed up glass of the shower. Knowing it was Caius probably trying to wash away all the ground in grime, she sank her head back into her pillow and drifted back to sleep.

The next time she awoke, the red letter of her alarm clock read 5.00am. Caius was by her side. His face was pressed into the pillow so all she could see was a mess of dark, damp hair. His arms were under the pillow and his fingers had curled over the top as if he was holding it in a desperate embrace. Evie watched him for a moment, silent and still beside her. She ran her fingers over his shoulder and her heart sank at his lack of warmth. His lack of life. Now that she was human, she was suddenly aware of how…inhuman vampires really were. With their cold skin. Un-beating hearts and impossible stillness.

She felt like she was sleeping with a corpse.

Trying her best to ignore the distressing thoughts, she turned her back to him and burrowed deep into the covers as if trying to cocoon herself from reality.

It wasn’t until 11.30am when she woke again, feeling restless. She left Caius asleep and grabbed her dressing gown from the hook behind her door. The sunlight bathed the kitchen in a pool of orange. She had never seen the kitchen in the sunlight before and noticed that it needed a good dust down. Dust malts floated in the air, swirling with Evie’s movements. She couldn’t believe how much she had missed sunlight and how her amazement hadn’t worn off yet. It was like seeing everything through brand new eyes. Or her old eyes? She shuddered and glided to the fridge when her stomach growled. But of course, all she had in was a blood bag. She needed to go shopping. Shopping for food. Real human food. Because she was human now.

Caius lay unmoving as she showered and dressed. She dried her hair at the dressing table, not even attempting to be quiet because she knew there was no need. Vampires were practically the dead in the day. The sun pulled them into a unconscious state only very skilled vampires could pull themselves out of. Caius was one of those skilled vampires, but he only ever woke himself when the sun was up if his life was in immediate danger because the side effects weren’t for the fainthearted. He’d feel sick and hungry but unable to stomach blood as his own poured out. Much like what had happened to Daisy, the vampire Nico had injected, or rather Evie had injected.

Evie shoved on her boots and paused at the front door before running back up the stairs and grabbing a woolly hat. She tucked all her signature red hair inside it and checked herself in the mirror before leaving. She kept her head down as she walked to the nearest supermarket which was about ten minutes on foot. Even the short walk made her miss her vampire speed. She nearly got run over by a car in the car park, and the shock of it had sent her motionless for a good few seconds, her hand on her pounding heart and her eyes wide with panic. The man behind the wheel honked at her and threw his arms in the air. She cringed and mouthed an apology. Her mind was all over the place. So many people. The crowd made her heart pound. Yes, that was that sickening feeling deep inside her. Heart palpitations. Sweat coated her palms and she squinted into the glaring light as she stepped through the automatic doors.

Evie had never been good with large amounts of people. But that was because she had been a vampire hiding under the radar. She was human now, just like the rest of the people around her yet she still felt like she was on the outside looking in. Why? Because she had no idea what she was doing. She had no idea what she wanted to buy. She hadn’t gone shopping for food for a hundred years and back then, there weren’t any dauntingly sized shops like the one she was stood in now.

“Excuse me, love.”

Evie jumped to the side as a woman skimmed her with her trolly. She grabbed a basket uncertainly, hoping she was blending in, and started following the woman, seeing if she could copy the woman’s shopping list.

She followed her up one aisle, trying to look as casual as possible as she placed in her basket what the woman had taken moments before. But then she started noticing the sideways glances she was getting so she moved onto a man and started following him. Once her basket started to overflow and she got worried she might not be able to carry everything home due to her sudden lack of body strength, she headed for the tills.

It wasn’t until she was back in her home that her tensed up muscles uncoiled and Evie was finally able to relax. It was the first time she had needed to use most of the cupboards in the kitchen and she found herself getting rather giddy as she unpacked and started to assort what she had bought. When she opened the freezer though, she frowned. It was empty and there was only one blood bag in the fridge. Caius must have drank the rest in the night. She could have gotten more for him if she’d known but she was too tired now after the heavy lifting and the twenty minute walk.

Remembering how bland her cornflakes had been at Nico’s, Evie had bought a chocolate cereal and poured herself a bowl of it. The thought of dinner made her heart spasm with anxiety because she had no idea what to cook. Did she even remember how to cook? She had tried to forget everything about her old life before Caius had Turned her and even if she did bring up the past, she doubted it would help. Too much had changed. She needed to learn how to be a human in 2034.

Comments & reviews · 3
User avatar
megsug
Review
megsug wrote a review Review · Aug 6, 2016

Heyo~
So much for writing a review a day -_-
I'm really going to try to get through soon though. Before I go back to school.

Anyways.
I love the second half of this chapter.

I agree with the other two though. This should be separated into two chapters. I think the fact that it's not makes it feel more rushed than it is because we go directly from heart stopping escape to normal life. A chapter break would just give us something to separate those two worlds.

It would also challenge you to make the escape scene longer which I think is necessary. I do the same thing. Either my escape scenes are way too easy or... Nonexistant xD
I'm kinda split on how believable the lack of security is. On the one hand Nico's never had a recovered vamp on his hands before. On the other, he's got a house full of tortured vampires that would take any chance to escape. Surely he would have more protection. I think you could add somewhere that Nico's blinded by his own hubris. He could assure her that he trusted her not to escape, there's only a gate keeping her in anyway or he could brag that he never needed more than a gate none of his prisoners had ever made it past the room of cells. Adding that would just tip the reader off that escape could potentially be easy beforehand so we're not raising our eyebrows when the scene takes place.

I also feel like the scene is very detached from the reader. What makes a good action scene isn't action so much as the emotion and thoughts of the person in question. What I thought was lacking personally was Evie's reaction to the deaths of the guards and how quickly Caius killed them. To be honest, I kinda understand why humans are so terrified of vampires. He killed all those guards is seconds!

Then he bit her. Whoa. That's a big deal and if I was Evie I would question my safety.

Which leads me to a question: Caius turned her once without her permission (I'm assuming since she was yearning to be human again). What's keeping it from doing it now?

I loved the scenes where she's getting used to being human and I can't wait to see more!

Onwards,
Megs~

Hello!

I haven't read this novel in so long I have to go back and skim-read the chapters so I know what you're talking about haha.

I agree with you that the escape should be longer, it's probably my least favourite scene in the whole novel. I keep going back to edit it but it's difficult so thanks for the pointers, I'll use them.

Yeah, the part where Caius bit her was to show that, yeah they might be back home but everything definitely isn't back to normal.

User avatar
Sonder
Review
Sonder wrote a review Review · Dec 20, 2014

Hey Gangamash! Here for another short review!

So I think Biscuits got all of the grammatical stuff, and I understand that it's only been a day. I'll focus on the story.

There's really not much extra I can say here. I agree that I think this chapter felt a little rushed. I know you claimed that you didn't want to split it into two, but I feel that this chapter could be smoothly broken in two after the kiss perhaps, and maybe expand upon both ends. Right now I feel that we have the basic information, sure, but that it could really be improved.

Anyways! The escape was awesome. I loved how you described his superhuman speed and such. I am wondering though, was that silver gate really the only obstacle that Nico put up, perhaps even unintentionally? I would think that Nico would have more precautions than that, but maybe that's just me.

That kiss though. O.O Wow. It was so good, and I was as surprised as Evie when it was abruptly cut off.

I was confused by this sentence. It just didn't make sense to me?

Knowing it was Caius probably trying to wash away all the ground in grim...

Could you explain it, or is it a typo?

The entire parallelism between Caius and sleeping with a corpse gave me chills. That would certainly creep me out. He wouldn't move at all, no breathing, no nothing. Just...a body in the sheets.

Question. Why do vampires need to sleep at all, I was wondering? Just to pass the time? Or do they actually need to revitalize their bodies as humans do?

I found it kind of funny how she was following people in the supermarket. Again, I would expand on this. Considering she's probably never been inside a supermarket, wouldn't she be awed by the lights and the ads and all that? Just a thought.

I felt that this chapter began to slow down a little, which was a good thing. However, I felt that it happened too quickly. It went like, "Caius, I unlocked the door!" to "Caius, yay you killed everyone!" to "Oh by the way now life is back to normal." It just felt like the transitions could be a little smoother. The action scenes were fabulous, I just felt that it could slow more gradually than this. I would think Evie would be having post tramatic stress, at the very least. She may have used to be a vamp, but wouldn't being human make her feel pretty vulnerable?

So that's all! I liked this chapter. It could use some improvement, but it was still fabulous. :)

Keep writing and being amazing!

~Night

Hello again!

Yeah, I've been busy with work so I haven't got round to sorting out the grammar stuff yet. It is an odd chapter, I know =/ It's because it's such a huge transition from 'OMGOOOOD WE'RE GONNA DIE' to being back home haha. I'm trying to think of ways to maybe stretch out the escape and make the transition a bit less jumpy. I'm working on it!

The guards, the (belated) alarm system and the gates were Nico's obstacles but yeah, they were pretty useless against a newly fed ancient vampire. That's why he usually kept them weak.

The way that Caius bit her tongue when they kissed was to show just how much had changed. They can't just go back to the couple that they were before. Everything's different now that she's human.

I don't see why that sentence is confusing? It's not a typo. Evie wakes to hear running water and knows it's just Caius washing away all the blood and grim.

I wanted the parallel between vamps and humans to be a little disconcerting and creepy. I don't like vampire books that make them out as super sexy, romantic beings because in truth...they are creepy...right? And even the Caius is a hotty (in my eyes anyway) he's still a vampire and so yeah, he's still a little...dead.

They sleep in the day before the sun makes them fall conscious, I'm pretty sure it was explained in this chapter. Only very skilled vampires, like Caius, can wake themselves out of it.

I put in a few things about Evie's new vulnerability, like when she nearly got run over. That wouldn't have been a big deal when she was a vamp. I'll see if I can squeeze more in.

As I said, I'm still working on the improvements! Thanks for the constructive criticism :)

Sonder replied · Dec 20, 2014

Great, glad to hear all that! About that one quote, I think it is a typo. If you meant "blood and grime", right now it says "ground in grime". Otherwise, glad I could help! :)

User avatar
ExOmelas
Review
ExOmelas wrote a review Review · Dec 18, 2014

“Kill your guard friend then close your eyes and don’t move until some tells you to. Forgot my face.” - take a new paragraph for this speech

'Tears brimmed in the guards eyes as he turned and shot the remaining in the chest.' - 'guards' should be 'guard's' and you missed out 'guard' between 'remaining' and 'in'.

'and it sent her head whirling.' - I think you could give this its own paragraph. It's a pretty significant step that she now feels sick about something inhuman. If you isolated it the reader's attention would be grabbed.

'In front of the lay two armed guards, their heads twisted in obscure angles.' - 'in' should be 'at' and there should be a 'gate' between the 'the' and the 'lay'.

'The sounds emanating from her Making' - 'Making' should be 'Maker'.

'blood smeared Caius’ face' - I think would also work as its own sentence.

'“Whoa, are you okay.”' - this should be a question.

I feel like Nico would know her last name. He just seems so all-knowing. Maybe you could drop in some hints earlier of him having some gaps in his knowledge.

I think they got home too easily. Maybe there should be more of a chase and they loose them in a street network or something.


I really hate critiquing this story because I enjoy it so much. I think the start of this chapter was a bit rushed. We never even got a hint of what Nico was doing in all of it. It was like you just wanted to get them home as soon as you could. In fact, I think this could possibly have been two chapters.

However, gah I'm so excited. I was looking at the list of chapters and I'm so proud of you for getting so far. I new when I clicked the prologue for this story that it was going somewhere. I am so invested in these characters that I don't even see it as work to earn points when I'm reviewing this. I honestly love this story.

Well done! :D

I only edited this twice so I figured there'd be a few mistakes =/ Ah well, more coins for you! haha.

Nico is actually a massive dumbass, he just thinks he's super smart. You'll learn more about his idiocy throughout the novel.

Chasing a vampire in a car is pretty damn impossible, that's why they got home so easily. Once they got out of the compound, nothing could stop Caius. Plus, Evie had her face pressed against Caius' back and her eyes shut the whole time so she wasn't witnessing much. But I get what you mean and this is definitely a chapter that I know I need to go back and tamper with later on.

I didn't want to break it into two chapters because just Evie getting the plan underway took up two chapters and I didn't want it to seem like I was dragging it out longer than needed. Plus, all of the important stuff happens after they escape. Evie and Caius being in Nico's mansion was just sort of the start line, now that they're home, the story really gets going.

Thank you! :D The novel is actually about 4/5 complete, but I need to wait until I have enough coins to update. And now that the price has gone up it's taking me even longer -.- Not happy about that at all.

I keep changing how I want the story to end though, it can go in so many different directions and I can't make up my mind XD But I'm writing other things as well as this so I have quite a while until I have to knuckle down and come to the final conclusion :P

I'm so glad you're enjoying it! I love vampires and I've always wanted to write a vampire novel but have never had a strong enough idea until now!

So I hope you are happy with the final ending I decide to go with.... Haha.



A wizard is never late. Nor is he early; he arrives precisely when he means to.
— Gandalf