X

by Lauren2010
  • January 28, 2010
  • Novel / Chapter
  • Fantasy
  • Old Stuff
PreviousNext

Thanks to everyone who reviewed! This is currently being rewritten.

Comments & reviews · 2
Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.

User avatar
borntobeawriter
Review
borntobeawriter wrote a review · Sun Feb 07, 2010 3:31 pm

Hey Lauren,

Great Chapter! I'm really enjoying this lovely tale so far. As far as 'grammar' mistakes, I only noticed one:

The conversation didn’t help to keep the nightmare at bat.
Um, I think you mean at 'bay'? ;)


That's it for now, it was excellent, I'm going to the next!! :D

Tanya

User avatar
Daisy131Spoink Comment
Daisy131Spoink commented · Sun Jan 31, 2010 6:22 am

At first I thought that Natura's name was Naruto, HAHAHAHA Ignore that anyway so.....critique time. I really think that this is good, I mean it is short and has a few grammer mistakes but still I really liked it. Nice names to....very different!



When a good man is hurt, all who would be called good must suffer with him.
— Euripides