Marble mask

by Laure

Published January 8, 2014

12+

In Poetry

Secrets are made when

Glass lacerations appear

On the marble mask

Comments & reviews · 6
ConverseFireGirl commented Comment · Jan 8, 2014

Hey there! I really enjoy reading your works, and especially reading haikus!
This is a very mysterious piece of poetry which is one of the reasons as I like it so much, leaving the reader slightly wondering what happened.
Seriously amazing visual side to it, really beautiful! I love your work!
-CFG

Laure replied · Jan 8, 2014

:) thanks! Actually, I think your work's better. I love Fragile!

My dear, it is not me who is on the Spotlight :D But thank you and great work :)

TheMissingPiece wrote a review Review · Jan 8, 2014

The Missing piece here for a review! *Claps* Bravo! I really like this because its so secretive, so....mysterious. It feels almost like an opener for a story! It's really beautiful! I didn't notice any grammar mistakes so that's good... But I really like how you open with the word secrets, it really draws attention. I love it! Keep writing!
~The Missing Piece.

Laure replied · Jan 8, 2014

:) thank you so much! glad you enjoyed it!

I enjoyed reading it! Thank you!

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Renard
Review
Renard wrote a review Review · Jan 8, 2014

I found it difficult to interpret this work because it was so short. However, I think the way you have written it is effective. A line by line analysis reveals:
‘Secrets are made when’ This is obviously one of the major themes of your writing: concealment. Which is very interesting and fits with the imagery of a mask.
‘Glass lacerations appear’ suggests to me that this is about some sort of mirror, hence the glass. Obviously it has broken and this would clearly be linked to the mysterious secrets you mentioned in the first line.
‘On the marble mask’ I have no idea what this means. But it sounds cool! XD Also, the imagery as I said before is very prominent. I see lots of broken glass, blood and a young man/woman wearing a mask.
To achieve all of that in just three short lines is a great effort. Well done.
Keep writing.
XD

Laure replied · Jan 8, 2014

:) thanks, oh and if you're wondering what all that insane rambling was. ;-; I explained in in maroon's review. Thanks so much for reviewing on this, I really appreciate it !

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maroonamorous
Review
maroonamorous wrote a review Review · Jan 8, 2014

Oh Hey Laure !!

So well, a short poem. Risky job, my friend. But you were good at it. Only, maybe because I don't like to think very much or maybe my grey matter doesn't often work actively, I failed to understand your poem.
I reckon it's like you tried to conceal your feelings and wrap them into beautiful words and present them to us, which is very good, but readers like me precisely don't really get it. Do I sound rude? Oh no! If I do, please know that I don't intend to, I'm just saying out what I felt.

Besides, my favourite part out of whole is- "Glass lacerations appear

On the marble mask".

Alright, I think, you can give yourself a nice treat, maybe some hot chocolate, because girl, you just did a wonderful job up there. Bravo!

Love,
MarS ^_^

Laure replied · Jan 8, 2014

Hey maroonamorous! Well, it is kinda an abstract poem so is ok. I should explain them to the best of my ability! What I'm saying is, that most days I hide behind a mask of coldness and indifference - hence the marble. But glassy lacerations-I don't know why I choose glass, it just sounded nice. xD cracks the marble glass, secrets are made. When there are cracks, they show the 'true' me and when that happens....well...don't you think those are secrets? xP

Thanks so much for reviewing by the way! Actually, hot chocolate sounds nice, real nice...maybe I should go make one. :D

Ohh, now knowing that 'does' makes me like this poem even more.
...and you cook? Oh my! Now I like 'you' even more. You're a darling Laure, know that!
~MarS

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GigiHarris
Review
GigiHarris wrote a review Review · Jan 8, 2014

Hey there Laure! :)

I really like the poem and how it made me think a bit. It took me a while to figure it put and I had to read this a couple of time. It's a wonderful poem.
Wow, this poem is like a puzzle. At first it seems like it doesn't make any sense but slowly all the pieces fall into place.
It's a beautiful poem.
Well done!

Keep writing,
~Gigi

Laure replied · Jan 8, 2014

Thanks so much, Gigi! Glad you liked it and love your avatar by the way! Despicable Me (2) is like the best movie ever...

Laure replied · Jan 8, 2014

Thanks so much, Gigi! Glad you liked it and love your avatar by the way! Despicable Me (2) is like the best movie ever...

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madisonmae
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madisonmae wrote a review Review · Jan 8, 2014

I love how this poem is a little bit mysterious and makes the reader think. I re-read this a few times and I really like how it turned out! Its really very pretty and you are a very talented writer. keep up the good work!

Laure replied · Jan 8, 2014

Thanks so much! I'm glad you liked it! :)



Look, a good poem is a poem that exists. Any poem you write is better than the poem you don't.
— WeepingWisteria