Young Writers Society

Very interesting poem! I love the unique format you chose to use for this poem. The indents between what you're saying vs what you think is "the truth" are very interesting and I am loving it. Very interesting take on the theme where someone is expressing their love for someone where you also express your inner thoughts. If I had to suggest any steps to make it even better I would say the main thing is consistent formatting. I noticed that for the majority of the poem, the words were indented, however, in these lines the indents are gone:

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

This poem is great! I really love the foreshadowing of the knife here as well its personification of it feeling lonely. The right side of the reality is very well done and this character is very believable and realistic The triplication and cyclical cycle is also nice! You don’t see those a whole lot in literature. Overall, great use of language and structure!

Hey there, Alice here to give a review!

MY THOUGHTS

A beautiful poem you have there. The idea of how can I love someone when I don't know or love myself yet was clearly showcased through your writing. The guilt when someone loves you much and you can do or give them nothing in return, we all must have felt it once in our life, it's a sad feeling, to say the least

I could never save you if your falling

because I'm too busy trying to catch myself