"No! Noooo! We don't want to do that at all! We don't understand much about it either. We were told to lead the Corps away from danger! As soon as we're safe you'll lead again!" Stormcloud said hurriedly. Bluejay was too surprised by his leader's hostility that he was speechless. Hawkscreech was usually fierce but calm.
"I don't care what you say. None of the strays from this Stray Corporation are being led into unknown peril by you two liars. In fact, you're both EXILED. Now, out with you both! Go!" Hawkscreech hissed.
Bluejay obeyed and streaked out of the alley. But Stormcloud had other ideas. She WOULD win this battle.
"I suppose you're too scared of leaving your oh-so-comfortable life, huh? Don't want to have easier hunting, or I guess maybe you just want to be exterminated by the humans. Oh well." Stormcloud lashed her tail. Bluejay turned around to see what was going on. Oh no, not now, Stormcloud, not now! Don't fight, or no one will want to be saved by us! Bluejay silently willed her with his thoughts. She did not seem to hear the thought.
"Great," Bluejay sighed. "He got her angry."
And indeed Hawkscreech had gotten the she-stray mad. Quite mad, actually. The brownish tom who was leader of them all, spat back, "What do you know about leadership anyway? You'll lead us all to our deaths! And I told you you're exiled. Are you too dumb to know what that means?"
"I know what it means, birdbrain! But you don't know what anything means. You're too idiotic to understand we need to GO! We'll be gone if we stay here! It's better to be smart and escape the REAL danger than to sit here like mice WAITING TO BE PREY TO THE HUMANS! You guys need to come with us, and stop being hostile 'smarty-pants'! Show how smart you really are and let's get going!" Stormcloud was on the brink of exploding, if she hadn't already.
"Well, fine. Let the strays decide. I'm sure they'll see through your lie and stay here." He cast a fierce glance towards the strays, extending his claws. They got the message, and so did Stormcloud.
"Oh, I see what you're doing. Those who say they'll come will be killed! By you! Well, you'll have to come through me to get to them!"
"Maybe I will!"
"STOP!"
The cats all turned their attention to Bluejay. Stormcloud and Hawkscreech both had looks of fury and hostility. They wanted to fight, not wait for a speech. But Bluejay did not hold back his speech. "Stormcloud, Hawkscreech, you both will stay RIGHT there. I will ask the strays whether or not they'll go. We'll take the ones on the journey who are willing to come, and those who choose not to will fight to survive in the city once more." He turned to the two cats who were so close to hurting each other. "And you two will have nothing to influence the choices of these cats." He narrowed his eyes, and they understood.
"Now. If you are coming with us to escape the city and its dangerous prophecy, stay in the alley. If you wish to remain in the city on human territory, you may go back to your meals in the food alley." Bluejay shook his pelt and closed his eyes. Everycat else did the same, so not to see what others were choosing until they had finished. Bluejay heard pawsteps leaving, but he could not tell how many. When he opened his eyes, he gasped.
Stormcloud's words echoed into his mind: "Someone's got to believe us!"
Bluejay stood and stared at an empty alley.
End of chapter
Continue to next chapter Forbidden Shadows Chapter FourPoints:
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Hello!
Great job on this!!!
I love this book! Keep writing!


Once again, a suspense-filled chapter!! I only have one nitpick....
"Everycat else did the same, so not to see what others were choosing..."
Everycat should be Every cat. Unless you are saying like everyone - everycat, then it is okay!
~Snazzy
Thanks for all the amazing reviews!!!

Oh, and yes, it was a bit of a failed attempt to be a little humorous when revealing their perspective of what we do and think.
ooh, twist ending! I thought that at least one cat would stay. So now some cats are going to die and after that they will believe them. Right? Just a prediction, I have not read the other chapters yet. But Bluejay prepared that wonderful speech, all for naught. And Stormcloud was willing to fight for what she believed in, that is spirit.
Thanks! I feel that I have set out good personalities for each - Later in the chapter comes Bluejay's. He is more of a nerd. As you can tell, Stormcloud is the brawn and Bluejay is the brains. Perfect combo, I thought. I'm glad you're enjoying my series!!!!
The end of this chapter is so surprising! I really feel bad for Bluejay and Stormcloud.......
And again, you made a perfect chapter. I can stop complimenting on your stories. I hope you keep on making the chapters!
I have to admit, you are one of my favorite writers on this! I have read many stories, poems, and other little stories, but so far, this one is my favorite.
The only thing that is wrong is that the word "Every" and "cat" were bunched up together, and they need to split apart. Just want to make sure other readers understand it.
Hope the review helped!
~Sunset101
Yes, about the "everycat" thing, that was done on purpose to show they didn't always use the same language as we do. I wanted to change things up a bit in their language
glad you liked it!
Oh, okay. No problem!
I'm onto my fourth review for this novel!
)
Again, this is getting somewhere, it's getting deeper into the plot and you're adding twists readers didn't expect.
You should try explaining what the alley looks like, or other cats protesting, or something like that. You're doing a great job with 3rd person, though.
"Well, fine. Let the strays decide. I'm sure they'll see through your lie and stay here." He cast a fierce glance towards the strays, extending his claws. They got the message, and so did Stormcloud.
I think this is my favorite paragraph from this whole chapter. You have your dialogue. You added in an action, and a fierce glance? Perfect!!
Keep writing and can't wait for the fourth chapter! (I'll be liking all the chapters from now on.
Hope I helped!!
~ WillowPaw1
Thanks so much for the support! I was hiding the names and descriptions of the cats on purpose as they will be revealed eventually.
Oh ok!
About describing the alley - I decided not to do that. I actually had thought about it, but then realized that the scenes may or may not change soon. I still am thinking about the plot's changes in each chapter, so the scene may eventually become different or alternate. That's why I was brief with the scene description
but thanks for the concern!