Hey to everyone! I'm new, but I have a strong passion for writing in many different styles....here's something to start with, tell me what you think!
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140,103 Literary Works • 673,000 Reviews
Hi,
Very interesting, I really don't get the story at all whatsoever but you make up for it with the beauty of your poem. Did you start out the poem intending it to rhyme? If you did I think you should try to make another copy of this poem with the intention of making it all rhyme? I think the first two lines are the most pretty because they rhyme. I would send the poem to Stone Soup Magazine www.stonesoup.com/stone-soup-contributor-guideline/ they are a big magazine that a lot of people read and you can also get paid for your work. I would also recommend to add a few more stanzas to this poem. I really like how you describe the emotions the character is feeling, I like the dreary dark feeling the poem gives me it reminds me of a lot of Emily Dickinson's poems. Post me if you make any changes.
Thanks thisisme! I wasn't really thinking about punctuation when I wrote it, but it could do with some. I guess I was just trying to get the words down and off my chest...
Heya Butterfinger! This is a great piece, and it portrays a bunch of emotion, but you're missing a bunch of punctuation. I understand you may have written it this way for a purpose, but in my opinion the poem would flow more adequately if some punctuation was put in. Thanks for your comment on my piece, I appreciate it! Hearts! -ThisIsMe