I'm on death row for a crime I didn't commit.

I decided to read this because it reminds me of Kafka's The Trial which I read long ago. Anyways, I feel like this poem is mostly just prose with line breaks, but I really enjoy that it's a narrative poem instead of just another lyric poem, which often seem to be basically synonymous with poetry. It is an interesting topic for a poem, I would make it longer and add even more events into it than just him telling people that he's innocent and getting killed. Maybe you could add his alibi in as an event, or his trial, or just make an epic poem about an innocent guy on death row. I would read that, probably.

I decided to read this because it reminds me of Kafka's The Trial which I read long ago. Anyways, I feel like this poem is mostly just prose with line breaks, but I really enjoy that it's a narrative poem instead of just another lyric poem, which often seem to be basically synonymous with poetry. It is an interesting topic for a poem, I would make it longer and add even more events into it than just him telling people that he's innocent and getting killed. Maybe you could add his alibi in as an event, or his trial, or just make an epic poem about an innocent guy on death row. I would read that, probably.

Hi there , I really like the way you've written this poem actually - it's direct and straight to the point when telling us how the person feels .. And I like the use of enjambment and the layout with stanzas. Also, the topic is really interesting. What I would improve though is the way you word things .. Like the phrase "how am I supposed to get free " doesn't really sound right in my opinion .. Maybe say "break free"? But I really like the part where you said "hear my voice but don't listen" etc - that's really powerful. Keep up the good work - this is awesome!

Hi Annaclare, Felistia here with a review for you on this wonderful day.

Okay so I think the biggest problem with this poem is the fact that you've written it in a way that you'd read a story. You've written it straight forward and left nothing to the imagination. I hope I'm making sense.

A poem is supposed to be written with complex metaphors and lots of descriptive words. Your poem was missing these things.

If you want to use dialogue in poetry, you want to try and use as little as possible. When using dialogue you want to make sure that it brings a lot of meaning to the poem.

And lastly the ending of the poem needs to be the most emotional part of the poem. So in your poem's case it needs to be heart breaking.

Overall this poem is a great idea, but just needs some polishing. Never stop writing and I hope you have a great day\night.

Your friend, Felistia.

Hey Annaclare,

I like the idea of this poem but I feel like it has a lot of room to improve. So I'm just going to jump in:

"I am not a murderer!
I did not kill her!
You have to believe me!"

I'm not a huge fan of dialogue in poetry. I feel like poetry works best using imagery (which I feel this poem lacks), similes and metaphors. I also found that you are writing very straight forward which can bore your readers. Imagery, descriptions, metaphors and similes are great in poetry because they make it feel deep and plant thoughts into the readers mind that grow and grow. I also felt that "you have to believe me!" was a little cliche and I just am not a big fan of that line.

"I can't tell you how many times I've said this.
How many times I've sat down and pounded the table in disbelief.
They look at me, but don't see me.
They hear my voice, but don't listen to me."

This stanza is a lot better than the first but it still needs work. It's a little bit more complex than the first three lines. I noticed that your punctuation is a bit weird. After the first line it should be a comma not a period. It's odd to end every line with a period. The third line and last line are the best so far because I feel like they can be given imagery or a metaphor to improve it.
Example:
They look at me, but don't see me
I am like a mirror, they only see themselves (something like that. I know it doesn't make much sense, haha but you're the author)

"I'm just a sociopathic killer to them.
When they talk to me they act as if I'm already guilty.
Names are supposed to define people
Rather my peers have decided to label me as a man of bloodshed."

I know it's hard to show not tell in poetry but still it's not good to be this straight forward. Like I said before it's rather boring to the readers. Also you spelled psychotic wrong (sociopathic is not a word).

"There is no happy ending when no one fights for you.
And as I have come to this realization
I have slowly let go of the life that has gone before me
And tell the world before I die an innocent man
That I am not guilty!"

I felt the ending was a little weak. Especially for a poem this dramatic, it's pretty important to have an ending that leaves your readers awestruck and left wondering.

Anyway that's all for my review. I hope I've helped. If you have any questions feel free to ask,
Alice