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<<_ you know it means so much_ >>



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Thu Mar 04, 2021 2:07 am
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Liminality says...



<<_ you know it means so much_ >>



Image

Code: Select all
y*u and m*

w* c*nsor pr*mises
& n*mes w* don't like
red flash across *ur
*ptics. they still recognise
the impr*nt of our ang*r.



Cyberpunky poetry about communication, control, or a lack thereof.

There's something fascinating about how machine-like people can be, or at least how I find us to be, and this NaPo thread is all about capturing that in heavily stylised, occasionally snarky and ironic ways.

My personal challenge:
- revisiting the following forms I did in NaPo 2020 and playing with them a bit more
1. tanka (including somonka)
2. (Petrarchan) sonnets
3. prose poetry
- trying out some mixing-genre forms based on various Internet things

[NaPo2020]

/load.files



Image
1 . . . . [ego]
2 . . . . [guide to convos - for subservient robots]
3 . . . . [140]
4 . . . . [You make storyboards from] remnants of static
5 . . . . [Announcement]
6 . . . .[manufactured authenticity in online angst]
7 . . . . [Comments section: let's keep talking <3]
8 . . . . [hyperlink fragments]
9 . . . . [capricorns fight back with CAPITALS & silence]
10 . . . . [(play)lists]
11 . . . .[satellite love somonka]
12 . . . . [turing test responses]
13 . . . . [can we really blame each other?]
14 . . . . [c*nsorship tanka]
15 . . . . [dead bots tell no tales]
16 . . . . [We are eating emotions like junk food]
17 . . . . [are tanka meant to hang together with title screens?]
18 . . . . [lightshow war]
19 . . . . [i wonder what happens to shy machines?]
20 . . . . [how do we live?]
21 . . . . [ownership]
22 . . . . [love (dis)interest]
23 . . . . [that person who likes old-fashioned things takes long walks at the park]
24 . . . . [several forum posts about people forgetting to breathe]
25 . . . . [end simulation]
26 . . . . [the most human thing to do is to try becoming something other than human]
27 . . . . [switching vocals: labyrinth life goals]
28 . . . . [you have a new friend suggestion]
29 . . . . [Status Updates are false advertising]
30 . . . . [blackout]
31 . . . . [online review]

Thanks for tuning in :]


Spoiler! :
GIF Source:https://mini-moss.tumblr.com/post/187621403554/moon-thief-twitter-instagram-print-shop
GIF Source: SP. 113 - Ghost in the Shell (1995), via https://scipunk.tumblr.com/
Title based on Duvet by Boa
  





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Thu Apr 01, 2021 12:59 am
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Liminality says...



Code: Select all
/load.files


[loading . . . ]

>> READY

>> ATTACHMENT 1


[ego]

I know that I should pick up where we left,
but hologram flowers ghost through my hand:
red and yellow roses -- and I can't stand
petals if they're not mine. Loading screen deft

to shut-down. And you and me the carmine cleft
greedy to burrow into every land,
every [new folder] of green meadows and
if we don't [sic] won't they be bereft? :-)

but sometimes I can't help but remember
the quiet rainy mud of November
falling in pixels, in [normal offline].

We were connections between edges
and we were unfulfilled dreams,

we trojan horses [waiting for a sign].
  





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Fri Apr 02, 2021 12:42 am
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Liminality says...



[guide to convos - for subservient robots]
(three tanka)

Mainframe, not sustain
selfless self-monitoring;
this one cannot speak to you.
Powerlines, over city
s t r e t c h -- pulsating red, aching.
.
.
Orange-light hallway,
this dead voice meandering,
thick wires of calls
the day, lived in reverse-step.
Dancing the conveyor belt.
.
.
I watch cardiograph-
-songs, slick with dust but no rust
and I must tend them
so s o f t and so s w e e t -- as ants
swarm between iron-plate ribs.
  





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Sat Apr 03, 2021 12:52 am
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Liminality says...



[140]

LiPo: I'm afraid watching stares start threads of spider-silk, now when everything is flammable, the insects are made of drones – & if my lovers are where does that leave me?

LiPo: Silk that becomes tendrils burrowing through my arms, marionette-makers know how machines work and exploit it. Flower gears turning, grinding away at memory bone --

LiPo: Blank greyish 12 pt. font. Broken engagement ring. I am becoming a link in history, never clicked-on. Only glanced over to get to what came before . . . what came after . . .

0 Retweets
  





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Sat Apr 03, 2021 4:53 am
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alliyah says...



Oh. My. Goodness.!! These are already so interesting Liminality, really strong start! I'm super impressed just in these first three how diverse you're able to make your theme. Especially loving some of the intense body imagery in these first few like " grinding away at memory bone --" and "ants / swarm between iron-plate ribs." AHHh that's so gritty and visceral and I love it.

Your tweet poem is so interesting too; because it kind of feels like you're replicating the style of when someone says something on the internet that's so nonsensical that it's kinda poetic, but you've really amped up the poetry, and there's like this whole untold story behind it or something. The "0 retweets" at the bottom really brought it home too - like when people bare their souls and then it's left unread. Eeerie feeling!

Truly looking forward to the rest of your poems! (Best of luck friend!!<3)
i can't love you if you don't know the difference between teal & dark cyan
&
you should know i am a time traveler
&
there is no season as achingly temporary as now

  





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Sat Apr 03, 2021 3:45 pm
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atlast says...



Lim, these poems are incredible! Like Alliyah said, the way you were able to emphasize your unique theme is amazing.

I especially loved the first stanza of your first poem:
hologram flowers ghost through my hand:
red and yellow roses -- and I can't stand
petals if they're not mine.

The beauty of the flowers and the angst in the narrator's voice is such a great preview of the rest of the gritty imagery to come.

Overall you have an incredibly strong start to NaPo, and I'm so excited to see what else you come up with <3
atlast

previously AtlasWut

my pms are always open <3
  





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Sun Apr 04, 2021 12:58 am
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Liminality says...



Spoiler! :
Thank you so much for the kind and thoughtful comments, @alliyah and @AtlasWut ! <3



[You make storyboards from] remnants of static

Is there an issue or topic that means
enough to you? Packing peanuts spilling
your words -- the phrases you've heard - (time-filling?)
A sloping crimson graph line that leans
towards the dramatic, nodes exploding,
rope-strings of hot powerlines lassoing
hyperlinks between -- whatever you've seen.

Then like a siren, red, it draws us in;
we imagine connections where you claimed,
following like drones to the honeybee-
hive of stories, reality hard to pin,
so we rummage through the mess you maimed,
conclude that white noise forms from memory.
  





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Sun Apr 04, 2021 1:09 am
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dancingontheclouds says...



Hi @Liminality! I am loving reading these poems! The way they look like a computer wrote them is really fascinating to me, especially the first one. It's amazing that you not only write poetry so well, you are able to do it like this! It's so cool!!

Great job so far! <3
Someone's missing from your group, someone very important ... Where's Momo?

Reviews~

Art Club~

Newbies Club~

she/her/hers/herself

Previously LordMomo and MomoandAppa
  





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Mon Apr 05, 2021 1:55 am
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Liminality says...



Thank you, @MomoMajesty!
  





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Mon Apr 05, 2021 1:56 am
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Liminality says...



Code: Select all
Rei Ayanami: Man fears the darkness, and so he scrapes away at the edges of it with fire

Source: Evangelion, Human Instrumentality Project



[Announcement]

01 says . . . Heyy'alldon'tyouknowIam
a precious coin? Gold rush me
why don't ya before
the power grid blacks out &
I sit alone in my house.
.
.
.
02 says . . . Just wanted to say
I'm different, okay? Love me
like nobody else,
rows of silicon masses
are folding forward--death wave.
.
.
.
03 says . . . I'm sorry I burnt
you out of your skeleton
with blue grave-fires,
a fork-tongued flame licks its lips
kissing a crash screen to black.
  





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Mon Apr 05, 2021 9:45 pm
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kattee says...



Hi lim!! Oof took me so long to reply haah I had to catch up you have so many works already! WOW And all of them are … *chef’s kiss* I can’t even begin to describe how much I love your works they are very well thought out <3 <3 [pom poms] *fangirling* [pom poms]

ego
Spoiler! :

Downright brilliant. I honestly don’t know where to start. I love your play of words, especially on the word “ghost.” It’s a homonym of the word “goes” so it suits perfectly when verbalised and that it’s phenomenally perfect for the mood of the poem because it gives this haunting and ghastly vibe.

Secondly, the “November//falling in pixels.” One, love the imagery. And two, love the play of words because November is associated with autumn or fall <3 So much details in this poem, stop being so talented ma’am.

oh my goodness after reading the last lines, everything just came together! I love love it. I could finally imagine what this “carmine cleft was” and how mental the character was in the lines “if we don’t [sic], won’t they be bereft?” + that formerly obtrusive or mocking smiley face morphed into innocence, for me. I felt genuine pity because that is their morals because that’s how they were programmed. It’s also probably bolstered by the last three lines. They can’t really process how “awful” it is, but you’ve inserted a very humane character in them, which is the urge to fulfill their purpose.

Did that make sense? Does it even make sense at all at this point? Yea no but these trojan horses are definitely my favourite complex character now. Justice for trojan horses [although they’re not really welcome in my laptop lolol]




...subservient robots
Spoiler! :


Quick disclaimer: I have no idea what some tech jargons are or how the hardware of any tech devices actually work so I couldn’t really understand it in that aspect. However, I tried treating them as if they’re three separate stanzas that are metaphors of reality and I’ve actually found what I’ve interpreted interesting oh my. So as a dumb person, I’m here to assure that even someone as dumb as me got something great in this wonderful wonderful poem.

I love the first tanka the most. It’s very relatable and creative. It could be an allegory of students and workers who overwork themselves to death.

--my brain could not process the second one. I am so sorry. “This dead voice meandering” is probly an allusion to my intelligence --

And I’ve imagined two different scenarios of the third one wow. First is the idea that it is an already decomposed corpse and ants are starting to swarm over it. And the second one is lung cancer. Erm. Idk. I don’t think you should search it because it’s disturbing to look at but a ruined lungs looked like a swarm of ants in the ribs



140
Spoiler! :

How do you keep getting such incredible ideas?? Shakespeare is quaking
Like come. On.
marionette-makers know how machines work and exploit it

I don’t even think my commentary is necessary for this one ^^ Even the line before that had such powerful imagery. It shows how she/he’s gradually losing herself.

insects are made of drones
>> can you stop writing such beautiful imagery. Stop. lol xx

Honestly, this whole segment gives off a tech or advanced dystopian-vibe and I’m here for it!!



...remnants of static
Spoiler! :
you’re an expert in writing poems that make a full circle. The relation of static was only mentioned in the very last part >> white noise and can I just say that I had to stare at the screen for a moment before reading the line (and the whole poem again)

And these could honestly be a sequel to 140. I’ve interpreted it as how she tries to recall all her memories through the help of some >> we imagine connections where you claimed >> and also I loved the line, “the mess you maimed,” it’s such an ingenious way of saying, “the mess you fixed.” maybe it’s because i love alliterations -- im probably lost in alliteration ok nvm that i wrote that at this point, i’m starting to believe that the words are bending at your will the sorcery

But on a serious note, like I said, I reread it again and came to another interpretation.

Is there an issue or topic that means enough to you?

^ ^ It had such a customer service staff tone. And the:
hyperlinks between--whatever you’ve seen

And I’m starting to imagine Google? Or the search engine in general and how it is a chaos of info that us humans would explode if we knew all infos in there. So that’s why it’s just “an” issue, a highly specific idea.

I’m not entirely certain but it reminds me of the idea of research and essays and how we organised different sources and explain them in a more cohesive and logical manner >> which concurs with “the mess you maimed” line right? And even “honeybee--//hive of stories, reality hard to pin” is a metaphor for how we can never really trust every info on the internet because disinformation and misinformation is rampant.


announcement
Spoiler! :

I’ve researched about Ayanami, Rei and it’s an anime character? Well, I didn’t really do much gleaning of info after that since I wanted to test if your poem could stand alone without me knowing that and it did!! <3

Frankly, I didn’t feel like these were said by three different characters. It felt like they represent the three stages of insanity

1>desperation > willing to be used, willing to do anything so that he/she/it won’t feel left out or neglected
2>Loneliness > i don’t think this one needs further explanation ”rows of silicon masses are folding forward…” evokes such great imagery
3>madness>it’s akin the concept of “i’m willing to destroy/kill myself in the process if that’s the expense of killing you.” AND CAN I JUST SAY, the last two lines!! AH sTOP that literally reminded me of that vid where a snake would look directly at you (through the screen), then just suddenly try to bite through it? It’s like a jumpscare of some sort and the monitor just suddenly black out?

I couldn’t quite remember. I think it’s Taylor Swift’s reputation gif. I can’t remember but that imagery’s so fascinating here! Because the snake symbolises betrayal and that’s definitely the case here. It started from willing to serve and looking for love from whoever he/she/it’s talking to capriciously destroying/killing that person. It actually feels open ended for me because It elicited more questions like, did the speaker do it for revenge and not just betrayal? Revenge for being used? >> ngl just got this idea because it reminds me so much of TS’ Reputation album (spoiler alert: such a bop)




Am I repeating myself at this point? I probably need to sleep now but oh my goodness IM SO HAPPY YOU”RE ONE OF MY NAPO BUDDIES

Thank you Ms. Einstein of literature. You’ve definitely written some (atomic) bombs.I’m so looking forward to reading more poems from you.
If you want some sweet reviews to your poems, short stories, and essays, come by Katteelogue.

Have a lovely day❤️
  





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Tue Apr 06, 2021 3:55 am
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Liminality says...



@kattee ahh thank you so much for all your comments! I loved reading all your interpretations <3 they are so interesting and well-developed and really motivating to see. Ah I hope you get enough sleep though - rest is important <33 Thank you again!
  





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Tue Apr 06, 2021 3:57 am
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Liminality says...



[manufactured authenticity in online angst]


ERROR: you weren't supposed to see this side of me. wait. let me start over. ctrl + z on these bright red strokes of pixel paint, like dissolving a colouring sheet in bleach to make it brand new, the hue of ivory or bone.

what i wanted to say was i was never happy, not even when i was eating that hot melted grilled cheese last night, which i must retcon to being rotten, tasting sour like the sting of isolation. i've always been an introvert, and i cheered when the automatic doors flew shut on me last night, but there's a devil bone pounding in my chest now right now-- and it flies back in time and changes past!me's mind - i'm suddenly not okay anymore, are you paying attention?

there we go, that's the set up. it takes place jumping between the monday and the friday entry, drawing a dot-to-dot that doesn't follow the order of the numbers, because i'm too old for following instructions, too old for following reality now. at the time before the first plot point i was mopping the floor, a pink handkerchief tied over my face the fabric shapes on my body flow placid over my body which i f/o/r/g/e/t and you f/o/r/g/e/t has spent its life plushed and comforted. did you know saturn's rings are disappearing? i said sometime wednesday, when computer class reminded me of being intellectual and needing to know things, but now i will

open another layer in this krita document and colour under and out of the lines, making a dull orange shape, round and bulbous. maybe it will glob together the melting ice fragments around the melancholy planet and hold them together long enough, so i can use that as a metaphor for my deteriorating bones. it makes it more romantic, see, because there's only one saturn, but so many people who could replace me.

ERROR: so . . . this is artistically awkward, but -- you weren't supposed to see this either. this isn't a movie. my selective memory speedpaint doesn't become more vibrant when coloured in with behind-the-scenes footage. those are the things you're supposed to cut out, right? and i don't care about truth if it doesn't get me what i want --


>> DELETE? YES/NO


Spoiler! :
Inspired by @Liebensteiner's prompt: 'coloring out of the lines' !
  





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Wed Apr 07, 2021 2:44 am
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Liminality says...



[Comments section: let's keep talking <3]


>It's literally so easy to be good
to make sure you say just the right things
and watch out for other people's feelings
you can be free and still do as you should.
And it's totally reasonable to brood
over not getting what you want -- I think.
Let's eat petals & see what else this rant brings,
sweet jam to make the edges go down like *ding*

>> read replies

>>>Sweet jam, sweet butter, cloying on the tongue.
Saying 'u r right' is like convulsing,
ridiculous cult rites for wound-soothing.
If you don't like it, change it. Towel-wrung
odes to unfairness won't do anything,
the world won't change over breakfast chatting.
  





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Thu Apr 08, 2021 3:26 am
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atlast says...



lim, your poems are absolutely wonderful! i'm sure i'm repeating myself a bit, but i am OBSESSED with the way you've carried your theme throughout your thread. the structure of your poems is so unique and they always make me emotional @u@

i'm so excited to see what else you have for us! you got this!!!
atlast

previously AtlasWut

my pms are always open <3
  








Today I bent the truth to be kind, and I have no regret, for I am far surer of what is kind than I am of what is true.
— Robert Brault