silentpatronus

Howdy ☺ I’m going to review your work! ☺ Prolouge Prologue is spelt wrong! I Had lost my house, my money, my sister. the all just disapeared and i would ...

Howdy ☺ I’m going to review your work! ☺ “18 sir. Please let me have this job. Okay so I personally think it looks better if you write out numbers. ...

Howdy I'm going to review your work! Okay so unlike most of the other works I've reviewed I think that this prologue looks a little too broken up. I feel ...

Howdy ☺ I’m going to review your work! ☺ Anyway im 15 years’ old people say im kinda skinny but most of those people are fat so that’s debatable. For ...

Howdy ☺ Okay; so let’s deal with one bit at a time. First the prologue. The bitter cold seemed to spike her thoughts of getting hypothermia as she walked, the ...

Howdy ☺ I’m going to review your work for you! ☺ I’m gathering that this is the introduction/overview. Which, if it is then you may need to mention in the ...

Howdy ☺ I’m going to review your work for you! ☺ She signed up for the JROTC. I hope that you’ll explain what this is later! My name was Daniel ...

Howdy! I’m going to review your work for you! ☺ One thing I’m going to say is that this to me is just a block of writing; just a paragraph. ...

Howdy! I’m going to review your work for you! ☺ One day at dawn,
 She found he was gone,
 I just feel like this rhyme is forced. It’s a little ...

Howdy! I’m going to review your work ☺ I’m not going to edit all the capital letters for you but there really are too many. They aren’t needed. Okay, so ...

Howdy! I’m going to review your work! ☺ My 6-year-old brother, Declan, is asleep in his car seat. It would make better reading if you wrote ‘six-year-old’. "Yes, Mrs. Holland, ...

Howdy! I’m going to review your work! This is really good. A nice continuation from the last chapter you wrote. I guess the only thing I’m disappointed with is that ...

I’m going to review your work. ☺ ‘Sometimes I struggle to tell the difference with you,’ the driver - Samuel - grinned reluctantly. This needs to be speech marks rather ...

Howdy! I’m going to review this for you! ☺ It’s only now that Justin’s youngness really occurs to me. Youngness is quite a pathetic word, can you either rephrase this ...

Howdy! I’m going to review your work. ☺ 1) The first thing I notice about this is it’s a big block of writing, just one simple paragraph. This isn’t visibly ...