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Re: The Dimmest Star
Hey, this was a cool story. I like the way you told it from a dogs point of veiw, the world around and the people in its life. I kind ...
Thu Apr 04, 2019 4:57 pm -
Re: That Boy
This is good, and a good representation of the sad reality of what has become of todays society. Nowadays it is rare to find someone who cares for others more ...
Thu Apr 04, 2019 4:49 pm -
Re: isolation
This is cool. I kind of see it as an insight to this novel that will never be written. It reminds me a bit of myself (I suppose it is ...
Thu Apr 04, 2019 1:57 pm -
Re: True Love
Hey, I liked this. I like how it was simpler in word choice, but envoked some of the feelings you would find in a complex poem. It was a pretty ...
Thu Apr 04, 2019 1:31 pm -
Re: the wanting of words? words left wanting? living words? - title yet to be decided
Hey, I just wanted to say, I love this work. It actually reminds me much of my own style, concentrating a bigger meaning into a complex array of words, good ...
Sun Feb 24, 2019 4:49 am -
Re: The Magical Musician---1
Hey, this chapter seemed alright. I just had a few things you may consider that could improve the story. Firstly, look for off sounding sentences, such as one in the ...
Sat Feb 23, 2019 9:32 pm -
Re: Heartstrings
Niiice, I loved it great job :D. As for the category, I think it floats somewhere near lyrical. I dont have much to correct, although perhaps the flow needed a ...
Sat Nov 24, 2018 7:20 pm -
Re: When a Childhood is Over
I like this, it definitely hits some key points in what many do as adults, losing the fun in everything, and at the same time losing meaning. Definitely a problem ...
Fri Nov 23, 2018 6:02 pm -
Re: Banished (Chapter 1)
This is a nice story. I like the setup, and especially the plot, an awesome storyline! Im pretty interested to see what becomes of this settlement. However, I think you ...
Fri Nov 23, 2018 5:51 pm -
Re: Lotus flower
Hey, good work. Thats a wonderfull message to send out, especially in todays world, where ones flaws are all too often blown out of proportion by others, making someone beautiful ...
Tue Nov 20, 2018 8:06 pm -
Re: Poem by Roger McGough. The Sound Collector
Awesome poem. I felt perhaps the description was a tiny bit different from what the poem is actually about, less about silence and more of sound and the descriptions of ...
Tue Nov 20, 2018 8:00 pm -
Re: Lightening Mountain
Hey, first off, awesome poem! I love the imagery. However, I think I spotted a few areas of which improving would make it all together better. I felt that perhaps ...
Mon Nov 19, 2018 8:31 pm -
Re: the boy
Wow, thats awesome. I love the reality of this, unsure if something said really represents whats inside, totally relatable. I like the slight romance about it. I dont really have ...
Mon Nov 19, 2018 8:11 pm -
Re: dark
Awesome, I think I can relate to this, the violent, greedy, selfish side of myself, which makes me forget reason, throw mercy down the drain. I understand what your talking ...
Mon Nov 19, 2018 3:01 am -
Re: Winter
Hey, first off, good choice of topic. Winter is one of the best things to write on, the beauty of the ice, the chills of snow, just a topic waiting ...
Mon Nov 19, 2018 2:47 am
