You would always call me your baby. You would cuddle at night, sleeping side by side. We both found it very important to get enough rest for the adventures that would fill the day that is to come. When I would lick your cheek in the mornings, with a raspy voice you would say, “Good girl Rivers, I love you”.
I remember my first day outside, I was such a happy puppy! Wagging my tail and chasing the cattle around the field with the bigger dogs. You looked so happy, standing there watching me, your strong voice bouncing in the wind as you let out a laugh. You loved me so much.
As time went on, you grew up and so did I. We still had time for each other and a super strong friendship. When the weather was warm and you were around more, we would always go out in the creek. We hunted frogs, snakes, and anything else that we could find. It was so nice to have my best friend around. I remember that some days you would take me for rides in your car, we would go to so many fun places. Sometimes, you would bring this weird girl around. I did not mind though, I got to be with you, and she smelled nice.
Things all began to change the day that a weird smelling box on wheels came by. I saw you, smiling. It was not your normal smile, you looked nervous, and you smelled like sweat. Mom and Dad began to help you load stuff that smelled like you onto it. I tried to get closer so that I could sniff out the situation and try to understand it, but, the only thing that you had to say was “Go away Rivers”! Soon, you would go into the box first. But before you did, you came over and gave me a kiss on the top of the head. I did not know it then, but that would be one of the last times that I would ever get to see you.
Ever since then, your smell has become so faint, that it is only a memory. I don’t really play much anymore, there isn’t anyone for me to play with when you are gone.
Mom and Dad seem to be missing you too. Their hair has turned grey and they move around a lot slower. I just wish you could come back. Some days, when I miss you a lot, I go down to the creek where we used to play. Back then, you were picking up sticks, pretending that they were guns. I would be an Indian, I was your Indian. These days, there are not any frogs to chase, and if they were there, I wouldn’t chase them anyway. What is the point?
I made you my whole world. You were my boy, and I was your pup. It seems as if instead of me being your world, I have turned into nothing but a dying star somewhere far off in the milky way. In a way, you are a star to me too. The only light I see, the only memories I have, they are from years ago. Back when you cared, back when my legs would allow me to run and match you step by step. That light seems to be turning dim, but then again, everything else seems to be fading too.
Yesterday, on my daily walk around the house, everything went...wrong. Pain followed me with every step. When I reached your window, I was in a warm spot of sun, it felt so nice. I laid down to enjoy it, but I had no idea I would not get up again.
Your mom and dad freaked out and to the vet we went. That got me here, laying on a table, wanting to see you one last time. Speaking of you...is that? Do I really? Is it even possible? I could have sworn that I just smelled you.
Then I notice it, a warm hand on my stomach, the crease in your face that appears when you smile. Your smell fills my nose. You are back, and you have come to say goodbye.
Goodbye, what a nice thing. A way to settle my years of heartache.
Goodbye my lovely human