StoryWeaver13

I like this. I kind of got a headache from the formatting for some reason, but this is a decent poem. My only problem is that I felt that you ...

This really is a beautiful poem. It's simple but deep, and manages to hit these resounding notes and epiphanies just at the right time. There's something very bare and human ...

This story is positively adorable. And beautiful, I might add. The structure and flow of your story is really what's hindering this, and I think it's because you're rushing. The ...

This poem's alright, but it feels a little vacant emotionally. It also would've been nice to see some connecting metaphor that tied the whole poem together and made it feel ...

This is really sweet...I caught an error, and that was "Because, honestly, you don't seem [[to]] understand." ...but really, that's it. As usual, you've written this really well and the ...

Okay, so this is a promising start, but there are a couple of things that I would advise you change. The first is the title of this story; now I ...

Perhaps it's just the fact that I'm drowning myself in sad music right now, but I sincerely found this a sad and wonderful poem. The last stanza felt a little ...

Hey, here to review (pretty predictably)! :] "Where hand and hand lovers stroll" < I would just recommend saying "hand IN hand," because at first I was like "hand...and hand-lovers? ...

LittleFox hit the nail on the head when she said that it needed uniqueness and the vague but ever-important "more" that is so often needed in a story. Right now ...

Okay, so there are things that definitely need to be fixed. Grammatically, the errors could be collected in clusters - places where periods should be commas, where spelling errors are ...

This definitely does capture some sort of sentimentality. The flow of the poem and the way it transitions is a little stilted, and I almost would've liked to see a ...

So my first complaint is probably more of a personal bias above all else, but it'd be my advise to get rid of the word "anguish" in the first line ...

Well, okay, so this was alright. There were grammar mistakes here and there and sentences that could've been worded better (there were some that I have to read and reread ...

"Somewhere in a little town, a nameless man stood alone, frightened, and as silent as the void. Bitter rain began to descend from the heavens as it always did when ...

This was alright, but I really would've liked to see a little more personality shine through. It came off as being a little cliche in my opinion, and typically that ...