Prince Edward Island

by JoyceSparrows

Published October 28, 2012

In Poetry

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The sea and the sky are a magnificent blue
But they aren’t as blue as the cliffs are red
More red than a sunset setting the world aflame
Thrilling and enrapturing whoever beholds
 
The wind breathes gently through meadows green
Through the trees that make up a way of delight
Where hand and hand lovers stroll
And gaze upon the waters that shine
 
The white washed houses have stories to tell
Of brides and children and love and joy
Of tears and sorrow and passing away
Where people not just stayed, but lived
 
For some their dreams began here
And inspired the minds of many
For others their dreams belong here
Living on this island of beauty and grace
Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
Mimiko Review
Mimiko wrote a review Review · Oct 30, 2012

POSITIVE:
Nice poem, indeed. I could actually imagine the whole scene.


NEGATIVE:
You've got a way with words, but sometimes, that isn't a good thing. Too many words (or in your case, wrong choice of words) may lead people to a different idea. It may also cause confusion.

Work on that.

RATING:
73%

User avatar
StoryWeaver13
Review
StoryWeaver13 wrote a review Review · Oct 29, 2012

Hey, here to review (pretty predictably)! :]

"Where hand and hand lovers stroll" < I would just recommend saying "hand IN hand," because at first I was like "hand...and hand-lovers? Hand-lovers? What on earth are hand-lovers??" Haha. XD

"white-washed," not "white washed" < Small grammar fix

"Where people not just stayed, but lived" < This is a bit of an awkward wording thing here. I would change it to "Where people not only stayed, but lived" or something similar.



Well in any case, I thought this was a pleasant poem to say the least. I love to see positive poetry now and then. I would advise not italicizing it and perhaps adding punctuation, but those are stylistic opinions and are completely up to you. All in all, this is a really nice poem. I almost wish that you'd divulged a little more on the emotional elements, but you've still done really well with this piece as a whole; honestly, I'm enamored with the images this portrays, so much so that I want to visit.



Poetry is thoughts that breathe, and words that burn.
— Thomas Gray