Demeter

Hey, Puckerman! Here for my requested review! Part 1. Some impressions from the first part: there are lots of big words already in the first paragraph – preternatural (I had ...

Hey, Siobhan! Welcome to YWS! You created a truly great atmosphere through the words. I really enjoyed reading this, because it's so accurate - I love it when I read ...

Hi, Shadow! Here as you requested :D The thing that I love, Many hate. The thing that I love, Takes many shapes. This didn't feel like a very strong start, ...

Hi, Isabel! Welcome to YWS! Warm hands grab my shoulders pulling me towards the source. What does "source" refer to? If it's the source of the warm hands, I'd suggest ...

Hi Embers! I enjoyed this, although I'm not sure whether I can use that word since the poem is quite distressing in a way... but I think it's also impressive ...

Hey, Blinky! It’s been a while, hasn’t it. :) So, I'll try to review this even though I know nothing about the Syrian civil war! I have some nitpicks (really ...

Hi, Aaradhia! "DOCTOR GRAHAMBELL!" said a grey haired scientist."We did it!We finally perfected it!"exclaimed the grey haired scientist. Punctuation aside, you should avoid repeating things like "the

Hi, Barrett! My first thought was that this seemed more like a poem than a song, as I think Heather below has mentioned. But, it's okay! Let me just give ...

Snooow! Your way of writing is so tasty. I can't really even describe why it appeals to me so much, but it's just so smooth and effortless and grammatical. You ...

Hi, Djinn! You have to be careful when using long sentences. This text felt a bit asymmetrical/inconsistent at times, because you had both those three-line sentences and then really short ...

Hi Alfred! Yes, more of these! I have to say though, I think you did a better job on the Carol of the Bells one. It's quite understandable, though, since ...

Hi Alfred! This was absolutely hilarious. :D Please say you took part in the Holiday Lyrics contest! I'm *so* glad to find that someone else does this as well - ...

Hi Tamara! I won't be going to those couple of spelling errors, because it seems like you have been mentioned about them already. :) I like the first verse, and ...

Hi, Jack! :) I'm not sure whether I like all the choppiness that the many periods and separate sentences create. That sort of formatting always makes it more difficult for ...

Hi, Gummy Bear! Well, isn't this a sweet piece of memory. :) Dad-daughter relationships are so lovely to read about in my opinion! In this case at least, when they're ...