Dyslexia

I don't have much experience with dyslexia (I actually believe that I have the opposite, hyperlexia), so I can't comment on the accuracy of the poem, but I like the meaning behind your poem, how you care about and admire your sister. My only real problem with the piece is that in some stanzas it seems to rhyme, in some others you seem to be trying to rhyme but not quite succeeding, and then there are a few where you don't use rhyme at all. If you cleaned the rhyme scheme up a bit, this poem would be very well-done.

Can I say one thing. This was beautiful. I thought that it was amazing that you would like to be her whether she has dyslexia or not. Many people today think people who are different cannot be there friends, but you have shown that even though she is different she still is an amazing person. I loved how you said:

Math is a challenge

And facts aren't her style,

But take her to the garden,

And there lives her smile.

It showed that she still lived her life to the fullest even though it was hard to get through sometimes.

Thank you for writing this poem.

Okay, I just want to say I'm in love with this piece. Personally, I discovered I had dyslexia in high school. I did my senior project on the disorder and discovered because of lack of testing and attention, I'd gone my whole life without any teachers catching it. This poem really touched a spot in my heart.

First off I love the form of the poem. The italicized parts and the way the stanzas are not too long, and not to complicated is what drew me to read the piece. You have so much to say yet you put it into such an easy to read way; that's what the definition of poetry is.

I'd have someone look over your punctuation. Punctuation isn't really my strong suit otherwise I'd offer suggestions, but I did see a mistake or two.

I would keep away from using so many contractions. It sends a message of sloppiness and it makes it seem as if you were trying to short cut your writing. You don't want to do that, because it is amazing!

I love the way this poem rhymes but the flow of it is a little sketch to me. Play with the words some more and see if you can get it to flow from the mouth with ease. Sometimes saying it out loud or memorizing it can help with the rewording process.

This is an awesome piece and I am very impressed with the insight you show for dyslexics. Sweet!

First things first: As someone who has had dyslexia for years, I am truly impressed with the beautiful insight that you have out in this poem. You really delved in deep and told a real story about a real person in just a matter of a couple stanzas. I really enjoyed reading this and I thought it was brilliant. Okay now on to the review:

I really like the rhythm in this poem, but I have a couple of suggestions that may help with it just a little. Like this :


"My sister is a genius,

Though you'd never tell

'Cause she cannot read

And she cannot spell."

Instead of saying "'Cause" try changing it to "Because"

My reason for this being that our lines in this stanza generally are iambic pentameter. Which means that there are 4 1/2-5 syllables in each line and the words alternate in stress and unstressed. when you use "'Cause" it cause that line to change to iambic tetrameter. Same thing as iambic pentameter but with 3 1/2-4 syllables. Changing this will improve the rhythm. Also where the rhythm could use a little fixing up"

"But I know better, and if I could

I'd be like her myself.

My sister is a genius;

She's like nobody else."

Instead of using "She's" you may want to try "She is"

Now, I don't have a grammatical reason for this one other than in my opinion, it would help that last line flow. Given that it is the last line, it needs to be the strongest, and I think making that small change will help.

That is really all I have for changes, but I would like to say that I really, really loved this stanza:

"Her brilliance cannot be taught -

No lessons to be learned.

That must be why, instead of a gift,

They're calling it a curse."

The way you point out how people call Dyslexia a curse is amazing. You also say that it is a gift, which I admire. People don't realize how truly blessed people with Dyslexia are. Society calls it a handicap, but I don't believe it is. The fact that you see this is well is brilliant, and I would like to say that it takes a remarkable person to see it the way you do.

Very well done on this whole piece. I loved it very much. I hope to read more from you

Good luck and happy writing,
BlockedWriter21

Wow, i really liked this poem. The way you wrote it and also the message it contains. Just beautiful

Can i please first say that i love this? I really do. It was beautifully written and conveyed a very clear message. I love how it really showed what some people forget, and that is that there are many different ways of being intelligent. Creativity really shows intelligence and is a beautiful thing. I also love how you represented what she thinks of the world and the people around her. I don't know whether this is true or not, but it feels very real. You should be very proud of this poem.

"But when the teacher says "focus!"
Her mind's somewhere else."

As much as i love this line, i have a small suggestion. I think that you should just use the word "is" instead of "'s." This poem has such wonderful fluency, and i think that it would blend with the rhythm well. This is just a suggestion, though!

"My sister doesn't think
The way us people think."

Feel free to leave this as it is, i do understand how it can be difficult to change things in rhyming poems, for sometimes you cannot just change a line or two. However, i personally would change the word "us" to "most." I feel like that would make it seem more as if she is extraordinary than just not a human being.

Also, i love the part where it says

"Her brilliance cannot be taught
No lessons can be learned
So that's why instead of a gift
They're calling it a curse."

It sounds better explained why i like it in my head than it would with words. It really does say a lot about society, and it is best to leave it at that. This poem is altogether wonderful. I don't think that you should make any major revisions. All things are flawed, and to me, this almost seems flawless. I hope that you publish more poetry in the future!

This is beautiful

Um, I'm just here to say that I love this. You deserve my like.

Really liked this poem! I liked the rhyming of the second and fourth line and the fact that it wasn't in every verse. In the verses that had no rhyming from the second and fourth line gave it an edge. This edge is rougher, contrasting the soft flow of the rhyming. This edge particularly stands out in the last two verses where I believe most of the impact was:
Her brilliance cannot be taught -

No lessons to be learned.

That must be why, instead of a gift,

They're calling it a curse.


But I know better, and if I could

I'd be like her myself.

My sister is a genius;

She's like nobody else.

Enjoyed this poem a lot! My sibling has dyslexia as well, so I could really understand what this poem was about and it hit home. Job well done!