Wow really good poem. I could really understand the strength of your emotion in the way you wrote. My favorite part I'd have to say is the way you tied in the beginning and the end and gave an amount of time to how long you miss this person, (which is every day and every night); this especially expressed the amount of emotion that's being experienced. I will say a lot of the words used here were very unusual, and I know this was probably intentional, but I feel the different words disrupted the flow of the piece and that if they were slightly different, the poem would work better. One example is, fatalist love, which is probably like that for a reason, but I couldn't read the rest of the piece without stopping at that line, and at other lines with unusual words. If the term was slightly changed to fatal love, I think that'd work a bit better. Another part I found confusing, is the fact that the person in the poem is missing someone a great deal, but then the third and second to last stanza makes it appear that this person they're missing doesn't quite deserve it; I thought that was strange considering there is a whole poem about the person. However, there's most likely a reason behind these choices that I'm just not seeing, so if that is the case, feel free to disregard this review, lol:) I enjoyed reading this and I can't wait to read more from you!
Points: 262
Reviews: 13
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