Published April 12, 2014
In LAAC folder
Savannah pulled Caleb out in front of the cops. She was sure that this plan would work! Everything went smoothly, until suddenly, Savannah heard a big 'clang' sound and dropped onto the ground.
"Savvy?", Caleb said. Then he, too, heard the big 'clang' and fell.
"Good work, boys.", Margret said, walking up to the knocked-out couple with a frying pan in her hand. "Now, take the girl to jail."
"But what about the young boy?", one of the cops asked her. "He should also be arrested for assaulting a police man."
"Ugh. Fine. Take him too, but don't look him up in a cell! He just needs a little explaining to do."
The cops in the helicopter jumped down to grab Savannah and Caleb. They threw them into the back of the police car, and headed off to jail.
Savvy was wide awake by then, and tried to fight the police men. Of course, they out numbered her. They pulled out their tazzers, and shocked her multiple times. It was even hard for them to keep this stone down.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two police men grabbed Savannah by the arms, and slammed her against the wall. That blow to the head caused her nose and mouth to start bleeding. Caleb was across from her, with cops holding his arms, too. Margret then randomly walked out of a dark hallway and slapped them both on the face.
"OWW! What was that for?", Savannah said to Margret in rage. "And how did you find out about... me?"
"First answer: none of your beeswax, and second answer: I do my research. Plus, the face in the wanted poster looks just like yours. You didn't think of doing surgery?"
"Gosh dang it...", Savvy muttered to herself, although everyone could hear it.
"Margret, why would you turn her in? You guys are best buddies!"
"We WERE best buddies...", Margret replied with a snap. "Now, hush up, boy."
"Well then."
"I don't even want to look at her ugly, stupid criminal face any more! Get her new uniform and put her in a cell. She will be killed next week.", Margret said like she owned the place.
"But", one of the cops started to say, "We were going to get coffee and doughnuts next week on Tuesday!"
Margret just looked at them. "Then kill her Wednesday! I don't care!"
"Oh, I guess we could do that!", the cop said back in a happy voice.
"Just do what I said!!!", Margret demanded.
Savannah was now in a orange jump-suit. "Why, Lord WHY!?!", she almost screamed, "Why did this happen to me...?"
(THE NEXT PART OF THIS STORY IS THE SERIES FINALLY, SO LIFE AS A CRMINAL WILL BE TAKING A BREAK, WHILE I START A NEW SERIES!)
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140,811 Literary Works • 673,693 Reviews
Hey! Raven here for another review!
I apologize if I make any mistakes, I am on my phone and my fingers are very clumsy.
I am liking where the story is going! There is a lot of trouble going on in Savvy's life. She's been caught by the police, she's confessed her love for Caleb, and will be killed within a weeks time. Cool!
I like Margret, it's obvious she's used to getting what she wants. With her snobby attitude in the beginning with the, "I'm Margret, and my daddy owns the school, so if you make me mad, it's over for you." That made it clear that she might not have been the best character... Now, her true colours have shown. With turning in Savvy to the police and slapping Savvy. We know she is no longer a character we should like.
Though, I have a bit of a problem with the cops and the way Margret is acting.
To the police, she's just a random girl that beat their two suspects up with a frying pan. Wouldn't that be... odd? (This is a personal opinion) I wouldn't trust someone who just hit someone with a frying pan. Actually I might stay away, far away.. (End of personal opinion.)
Also, Margret's ordering the police men around. Why would they obey her!? Yeah, they're "dumb" but are they seriously that trusting? (I love how comical they are, though.)
Keep on writing! Love this series!
Rae,
Teehee, Margaret's dad is someone very important, you will find out in chapter 2 or 3 in book 2. It gives her a right to order them around, and if Margaret made a move on the police, they have tasers XD
I thought this book was awesome, like I said in the comment.
I thought you grammar and spelling was fantastic no mistakes in this area.
I thought your punctuation was also good.
This is a review this time not a comment. Sorry I had to comment but I didn't want to be late for school. Cause I am a good ggirl. Okay back to you now!!1
This series is on of a kind and one of the kidns I love to read. I cant wait to read your next book of life as a crimal and also the story of my lie. Well talk to you later
Love,
dogsrule5
The book was wonderful. I really liked it. I liked the part where the cops said donguts and coffee. I am typing fastcause its time for breakfast this is just a comment I will write my big review later.!! bye for now and see ya tonigjt on u know what...
kk
Hi, Em101cats is here to review this! (As always XD)
First thing I noticed: When do quotation marks with no punctuation marks, the commas go inside the quotation marks. But that's okay!
I did notice some spelling errors but you can easily fix them. No biggie, I make spelling errors too.
I loved EVERYTHING about this! And I practically BURST OUT LAUGHING when I heard the policeman say "But we were going to have donuts and coffee next week on Tuesday..." LOL!!!!!!!! So comical!
Good work with this, it's a GREAT chapter, as all of them are. I can't wait for the season finale!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll always be reviewing your work, and you always amaze me every time!
~Em101cats~
cool beans
Yes. Very cool beans. Awesome beans.
cools beans with awesome sauce OH YA BABY!
Yeah!!!!!! XD
XD
Hey! IamTraunt here!
Before everything else, just something you need to correct:
^This needs to be 'course'.
^ You keep putting commas after quotation marks which isn't needed.
^ Should be 'against'.
^ You don't need to repeat exclamation marks, you only need one.
I find your story quite humorous. I love how the police men were stereotypically dumb and lazy, saying they were going to get coffee and doughnuts! And I also find Savannah saying 'Dang' quite comical, like she's admitted being guilty.
Good job! Keep on writing.
thx for liking it! and I like '!' so I repeat them a lot but I try not to. and I didn't know how to spell against so thx for tht!
and I didn't notice u reading/commenting my story before. did u just now want to read it or something?
Just wanted to help out by reviewing! Its a good story
it deserves to be read!
thx dude!
u should read the rest of the series then so u can get it all
Will do
Will do