Dream Catcher

Hi there, here to review this poem for you. After reading and reviewing another poem of yours, I can recognize the similar style of the other, even though they’re quite different in several ways. I like what you have here, although I think it is slightly lacking in terms of cohesion. Some of the lines don’t have seem to flow into the next, and it seems almost like random ideas floating around. However, this style isn’t a bad thing, in fact, I think it fits here nicely.

In other words, I like it overall. I think your ideas are good, even though they are a little bit all over the place, because it still works. Well, let me just go ahead and jump into my criticisms. There won’t be too many, since your poem is so short, but I’d like to try and be thorough.

Since it’s too short to really have multiple stanzas, I’ll just have the entire thing here and point out individual comments that I would like to make here for you.

Pictures on the wall, faces staring down at me.

Good imagery here. Also, I think it’s a really interesting way to begin your poem. It’s intriguing, but it also gives a feeling of oppression, even with so few words. Great job in that respect.

Going on and on, life seems so boring.

What exactly is going on and on? This line confused me, because this is where it starts to feel like you’re rambling a little bit. You need to be careful not to turn this into a list of complaints, but luckily, I don’t think It ended up that way.

No solace, sleep to sleepless me

You might want to consider rewording this, because this confused me too. Are you saying that sleep is your solace? Try to make this a bit more clear.

Pressure piling on, don't know where I'm going

I think you could find better word choice here as well. I don’t really get a strong image in my head when I hear this. You want something to make a vivid picture in the minds of the readers. That’s what makes poems memorable.

All I want to do is dream

and only let the good dreams through

to give life a meaning.

Ah, and now we see the purpose of this. You want to give life meaning through your dreams. So, my question to you is, how do the previous lines connect to this theme? You might want to consider this if/when you make revisions. You need to find some way somehow to make a logical connection between the first half and the second half of the poem, or it will just seem like a pile of ideas, which is not what poetry is about.

Something like a cause. Something like a

song

I like the way you ended it, even though it seems to cut off. I think it fits the style here.
Great job with this, other than the few things I pointed out. Thanks for sharing!
~Devan