hatred

I confuse myself who this poem is for. I’m interested in interpretations of who the intended audience might be. I’ve written a lot of sad poems or songs (kinda similar to this post-breakup themed one), just sitting in my notes app. If you are interested in more, please like this comment.

This poem broke me in the quietest way. The repetition of `“I have all of these thoughts in my head, / Not enough are centered on you”` makes it feel like someone trying to convince themselves to move on, but failing every single time. It’s such a real way to show grief and guilt.

I loved the imagery you used. `“And the curtains I let fall, / To hide all the tear drops”` is so simple but so powerful. And `“There’s a mist on the windows, that I stared at for hours, / Thinking you were out there in the green”` gave me chills. It feels lonely but also soft, like you’re waiting for something that won’t come back.

The honesty in `“And I never said sorry, / For the lies and the folly, / And you probably think that I’m mean”` is what makes this poem hit. It’s not trying to make the speaker look good — it’s just raw. And then `“But I’ll keep to myself, / And I won’t tell a soul, / And I’ll pick at my nails / Till they’re just little holes”`... that detail is so specific and painful. I could feel it.

I also noticed how the poem circles back on itself at the end with `“I left all of my life with you.”` After all the trying to “keep going” and “not think about you,” that last line shows nothing really changed. It’s heartbreaking and perfect.

If I had one tiny suggestion, maybe play with line breaks a bit more in the middle stanzas to let the emotion breathe? But honestly the way it is now already works — it feels rushed and heavy, like thoughts you can’t stop.

Thank you for sharing this. It felt like reading someone’s journal at 2am. You captured that space between missing someone and blaming yourself so well.

I really enjoyed this poem because it has a gentle, reflective tone that makes the emotions feel sincere and believable. From the opening lines, the speaker's conflict is clear—they are trying to move forward while still being deeply connected to someone they have lost. The repeated refrain about having "all of these thoughts" but not enough being centered on the other person creates a feeling of guilt that carries through the entire piece.

One of the strongest parts of the poem is its imagery. Details like the curtains hiding teardrops, the mist on the windows, and the idea of someone disappearing "into the green" create vivid scenes that make the emotions easier to picture. These images give the poem a quiet, almost dreamlike atmosphere that matches its themes of grief, regret, and memory. The repetition throughout the poem also works well, reinforcing the speaker's inability to escape their thoughts and showing how certain feelings continue to return no matter how hard they try to move on.

I also liked how the poem doesn't place all the blame on one person. As it progresses, the speaker begins to question their own actions, admitting they never apologized and wondering if they were the one who truly drifted away. That shift adds depth and makes the poem feel more realistic because it acknowledges that relationships and loss are often complicated. The lines about picking at their nails and keeping everything to themselves are small but powerful details that reveal how grief can show itself in everyday habits.

Overall, this is an emotional and thoughtfully written poem. Its repetition, strong imagery, and honest self-reflection work together to create a moving piece about love, regret, and the difficulty of letting someone go. It leaves the reader with a lingering feeling of sadness while also encouraging readers to think about the importance of communication and the memories we hold onto long after someone is gone.

Hi gruzinkerbell! I really enjoyed your poem.

I have all these thoughts in my head,
Not enough are centered on you.

That escaped into the green,

Good afternoon gruzinkerbell! Here to leave a review on your poem :)

First off, I want to comment on the title and theme of this poem: hatred. There's a lot of avenues a writer can take when it comes to that feeling of boiling anger and resentment. Hatred can be directed towards someone else, a philosophy, or themselves (similar to the types of conflict in a story). The title is intriguing, as it makes the reader want to know more about this specific emotion and what the narrator has to say about it.

I interpret this poem as the narrator reflecting on someone from their past, and holding a hatred towards themselves for how it all happened, even though at the time, their emotions pointed hatred towards the subject. The poem is complex in the way it delivers this emotion, as shown in these lines:

And I’ll pick at my nails,
Till they’re just little holes,

Calling all of your love hate.

I have all of these thoughts in my head,
Not enough are centered on you

But I’ll keep to myself,
And I won’t tell a soul,
And I’ll pick at my nails,
Till they’re just little holes,

And I think that you’re probably long gone,

From what I've gathered, it seems like the author is confusing hate for a past relationship(Whether it was platonic or romantic), with the guilt of it not working out. But, it also seems like the author is trying to force hate towards this person when all they feel is guilt. So, possibly this person cheated, or disrespected them in a way that made the author want to hate this person, but couldn't help but feel guilt towards them? I am not one to understand completely the meaning for poems since I didn't really pay attention to English when it came to stuff like this, but this is what I had gathered from this.

This is a very melancholy poem, seemingly about grief or perhaps unresolved guilt over the loss of someone, presumably a relationship, but it could also be about death? I like the format of the poem, like a long stream of consciousness, which makes the narrator seem like they are longing out into the nothingness.

A few little suggestions/improvements I noticed:

I have all of these thoughts in my head,
Not enough are centered on you

And the curtains I let fall,
To hide all the tear drops,
Are starting to cover you, too.

And I can’t seem to clear my mind,
But it’s lonely without your hand in mine

But I’ll keep going,
Won’t think about you,
If I think, that you’ll be alright

And I think that you’re probably long gone,

So I’ll keep to myself,
Let the burns turn to wells,
And crumple when I realize you’re gone.

From my understanding of this poem, the speaker seems to be trying move on from a failed relationship, while also thinking that the person they broke up with is better off without them. I got the impression that the speaker thinks their love for the other person might have been hate instead because their current thoughts do not focus on the other person as much as the speaker believes they should, if the speaker had truly loved the other person. The full meaning of this poem might be a bit unclear, but since this is an emotional poem rather than a plot-driven story, I think it is perfectly good the way it is. This is indeed a deep work and I really like it!

Hi, I'll be reviewing you work today!

Starting off, from what I'm able to ascertain, the first four stanzas are about losing/drifting apart from an old love, which caused you pain before. There's something weighing heave on the narrator's mind that's eclipsing his initial pain from the loss, now all he wants is the comfort of the 'old love'?
I like the mild rhyming, sets a very nice tone.

And I’ll pick at my nails,
Till they’re just little holes,

Let the burns turn to wells,

There are memories I let go,
And promises I won’t know,
As you keep on slipping away.

I have all these thoughts in my head,
Not enough are centered on you.

And the reasons I ponder,
And let myself wander,
I left all of my life with you.