nature through the lens of a girl
is oppressive
is unfair
is cruel.
~
nature through the lens of a girl
holds her back
holds her hostage
holds her to a standard.
~
nature through the lens of a girl
can be freeing
can be meaningful
can be, should be-
miraculous.
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140,764 Literary Works • 673,687 Reviews
Greetings! I am happy to review your poem.
First off, I like the structured feel of it. Each stanza begins with the same line, and that gives a great sense of consistency.
Secondly, I appreciate your consistency in verb usage; each stanza uses the same verb at the beginning of each line (except the first line, of course), which I admire.
The last stanza ends up with more lines than the first two, which sort of breaks the consistency, but seems to emphasize your final point, so I wouldn't necessarily change that.
Your poem looks clean the way the stanzas are neatly divided. Good job there. Also, your punctuation and grammar seem to be spot on, which I commend.
Overall, you've produced a nicely written work. Keep writing!
Thank you so much!
I love this poem! My favorite part is
It sounds beautiful! You are great at writing poems! Keep writing 😊👍Thank you so much! You're very kind
Hi, I’m here for a review!
First off, I feel the themes of this poem are very important and should absolutely be written about more. Go you on the feminist front!
One of the main features I really like in this poem is the repetition of “nature through the lens of a girl” (which I am loving as a phrase in general, but we’ll get onto that later) at the start of each stanza. I feel this really sets the tone for the poem.
I also really like the anaphora you’ve used here. In my opinion, it holds up the structure of the poem and keeps everything neat and tidy!
As mentioned above, I love this phrase! It demonstrates that this poem is about how girls see the nature of the world, and to me that helps emphasise the invalidation of men’s so-called opinions when it comes to the oppression of women.
On a more structural side, I feel as though a capital N for nature could have given the start of each stanza a bit more ‘push’, especially as each stanza ends with a full stop.
The anaphora here is on point, and I am enjoying the adjectives you’ve used, although I do feel ‘unfair’ is a bit weak compared to the rest of the stanza. Perhaps ‘unjust’ or ‘biased’ would be more suitable?
Anaphora again is awesome, and hostage is a good strong vocabulary choice here, demonstrating how trapped many women feel. The third line, however, seems a bit out of place amongst the short, snappy nature of the rest of the stanza.
I think you get the gist that I love anaphora by now.
I do really like this stanza though: it represents what life for women should be, compared to what it is, which you’ve described in the last stanzas.
‘Freeing’, ‘meaningful’, and ‘miraculous’ are also all adjectives which demonstrate this really well. Excellent job!
Overall, I found this poem a very enjoyable read with important themes you’ve demonstrated well, and I hope to read more of your work in the future!
Thank you so much for your review, it means a lot to me! I agree that unfair is a bit weak compared to the other ones. If I'm going to be honest, I was struggling to find words that could fit, but I think the words you said would be a way better choice! Thank you so much
My pleasure