Human psychology is a tricky subject to be discussed as human behaviour can be the most unpredictable at times. One such instance is when one believes that their responsibilities shall be fulfilled by others. For example, in our homes, when there is a quarrel between two people, we generally tend to leave them alone to continue with their fight. We never consider the question whether that small fight might lead to something even bigger and dangerous .If this happens, that is the time we realise that it had all started with the fight which we could have prevented.
In a similar manner, if we place the planet in place of our homes and all mankind in place of our families, we shall find that we have been doing this sort of a mistake on a global scale as well. Then, the usual human response is to complaint about the problems that we ourselves have contributed to. Not only this, but we do it in all fields of life. Whether it be regarding the environment or world peace, scarcity of basic needs or delay in justice, we are always ready to hand over the responsibility to some other person.
Firstly, our environment is supposed to be solely our responsibility. Instead when the time comes to fulfilling our duty, we are the first people to blame it on someone else. Taking an instance from our daily lives, when we see waste polythene on the floor and are told to pick it up, our first reaction is the question that it might have been thrown by someone “else”, hence, why should “I” pick it up? Similarly when we throw something on the road, our typical mindset is that someone else shall pick it up. Hence, the process of destroying the environment is working both ways where one that is making the mistakes states that someone else is going to rectify it and the person who is asked to correct it, refuses by saying that since he hadn’t made the mistake, he wouldn’t correct it either.
Secondly, humanity - a term which has been developed from the word “human”. In spite of this fact, it is we, ourselves, who violate or even ignore the decrees of humanity. Our planet, Earth, is not just a place for us to live but to live peacefully without any fear. It is surprising that when it comes to our loved ones, our concern is immense but when it comes to strangers, we are least bothered. A simple example is something seen in day to day life. There are times when we come across people who are needy and helpless, without a roof above their heads. When a beggar comes to us asking for some money, we ignore probably thinking that there are many other people out there who shall help him. But we might never have thought that “why can’t I be one of those generous human beings?”
Thirdly, it is human relationships also which are at stake. As mentioned earlier, our Earth is not only a heavenly body made up of magma and rocks. It is this World made with love, kindness and generosity. It is not always that we can be “good” to others but we are at liberty to be “good” when we can. So, why not wipe a tear from somebody’s cheek? Why always check whether we “know” that person or not? And, even if we don’t know that person, it will not do any harm to us to spread a smile on someone’s face. This is how world peace can be restored by spreading harmony among all.
A few weeks ago I heard about a lady who has adopted an underprivileged child. Although such occurrences might be common in present day but still, there prevails a notion in the layman’s mind which is that “why shall I care for ‘someone else’s’ child? Well, my answer to the question would be that we ourselves are increasing the population day by day but never worrying about the already existing mass of people with no one to provide for them. Why not make our family with those already present human beings, benefitting both ways? Hence, this perspective covers my fourth point of rational thinking.
Concluding this essay, I would like to say that yes, there is always that “someone else” in our lives, but not for doing the things we are supposed to do. They are there to help us, support us but never act like a proxy for us. In fact, if we all, people of this world and children of Nature, accept all the differences and get together to save “Our Planet”, we can definitely do so. The title of this essay also makes another thing clear. It is this that even in our life, the short life that we all have, people come and go. They may hurt us or do just the opposite by giving happiness to us. One job they shall never do is solve our problems for us neither fulfil our responsibilities for us. It is we, who have to go through the storms in our life to find sunshine. As in the words of Michael Jackson, let us
“Heal the world; make it a better place, for you and for me and the entire human race...”
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Hey there Sharon1407. It's just lizzy dropping by real quick, so without a further ado, let the reviewing begin.
There are actually a couple of quick notes that I'd like to make before we even discuss content.
1. The previous reviewer was telling you not to use 'firstly, secondly, etc.' for grammatical reasons but I've got another. To me in essays it's not exactly necessary because the reader knows from the order of the paragraphs, this is the order of your thoughts. And this isn't because of your one phrase. It is about any of the variations such as 'first and foremost' or 'to start with'. Those (to me at least) just send out a 'trying to hard to be serious and organized' feeling.
2. Your conclusion does not need to say "In conclusion." My Language Arts teachers have told this to me so many times because it's how they drilled us into writing essays in the lower grades. Sometimes they are necessary but from the little of your essay that I've read so far, I don't think you need it.
3. Now I haven't read the essay yet, these are just some preliminary thoughts, but I think you should probably shorten the title a bit. I mean it's nice to have that great and powerful quote but it is so long to read. Once I read through all this stuff, I'll probably come up with a good suggestion.
Grammar, Spelling, Typos!
1. Okay so I didn't really see that much in the way of actual grammar and actual spelling issues but there are a couple of typos. I mean they didn't distract me that much but after awhile I started noticing them more and more. It was mostly just stuff like three spaces or a space in between a comma and the last word of the sentence. Just thought that I should mention them since they were bothering me in the back of my mind.
2. The previous reviewer already mentioned this but I wanted to second it. When you were using the quotes, as I think they were meant to be air quotes, I have a little suggestion for you. Just use the single apostrophe instead because the quotes get a bit bulky. Just a thought but use it if you like.
Opening and Closing Lines
1.
This line sounds a bit clunky too me and not very well put together. I can't come up with a good re-ordering at the moment but give me a bit. If I think of something later, I'll add it on to the end of this review. I wanted to comment on it because it doesn't sound like a very good opening, attention grabbing, totally great line. Really as long as you hit 2/3, the line is a good start. It didn't really catch my attention at all.
2. I really don't think if you're going to end with a quote (something that isn't a great idea) that you should put it two line shifts down and leave the intro to it with the rest of the paragraph. You have to leave those two together. And the quote should be separated from your final paragraph. So just move the whole kit and kaboodle down there.
It may be that I'm just a bit tired by reviewing this but none of your points really seem to make sense. It just seems like you threw a bunch of facts together in an organized-ish manner and then re-read it. Perhaps it is just that I have not yet taken psychology or something but I'm siding more on the 'this needs to be changed up a bit'. I only got about halfway through before the writing was really dragging and it got impossible to read through. You were switching from third to first and from casual and formal, back and forth throughout the entire thing. There was nothing really consistent about the essay besides it was not at all interesting.
I'm sorry if you find it slightly bad that I didn't read your essay through completely before drawing judgement but I just couldn't make it through. This is really all I have to say for now but I'll be back eventually to add on to this review.
Have a nice day.
Lizzy
The Queen of the Book Clubs
Hello! Its Mikey for a review,
I must appreciate your nice essay work.In fact it is the best realistic essay so far I have reviewed. As the heading or tittle goes 'The Greatest Threat to The Planet is The Belief That Someone Else will Save It'. I like your first paragraph where you have first compared the essay with the normal life situation from a family. This has contributed much in just defining the tittle on its own.
Next, I think it is wrong in writing when you talk of ' Firstly, Secondly' and so far than while speaking. The suffix '-ly' should not be used for correct grammar but instead just use ' First, Second' which must be followed by a comma.
The last place is where you have used quotation marks or speech marks to mark strong points or words instead of just apostrophe or bold writings like for..
"else".........'else'
"good".........'good'
and many others...
Nice work and keep on..
Thanks.. really appreciate it...
Hi! Grammar note on the grammar note - 'firstly' is okay to use in this context. So is 'first'. Here's a quick source, just in case
http://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/gram ... r-at-first
It's okay.. and I have a thing for repetition anyways.. half my marks are cut in the exams because of this..