I've got SWAG, and that's a fact
People love me, just for that
Everything I do makes you stare
Well go on looking, cause I dont care
Your poor tortured souls bring me pity
You feel so much jealousy towards me
'Cause ive got something that you aint got
'Cause I am someone that you are not
You see ive got my own life, friends and style
And I aint tryin to be like you, or make you smile
When it comes to simple competition
You always lose cause you're full of imperfection
You can drag me in bullshit
With all your screwed up lies
But still i'll stand up, turn on you and hit
I'll be the dust you see, that'll always rise
One thing you can do that I cant,
Is kiss my posterior fit for your lips
Go on, slander my back with your chant
Didnt I tell you, ive got you on my fingertips?
You dont scare, you dont intimidate
All you do is make me pity you
Cause you're filled with so much hate
That shows just how much you follow all i do.
ANd to be honest im actually flattered
Thank you for making me
The essential existence
Of your already pathetic life
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138,225 Literary Works • 672,084 Reviews
Hi there!
This is a great poem. I really enjoyed reading it! The rhyming is good although 'pity' and 'me' don't really rhyme, but it still works. I couldn't find any grammer or spelling errors, so you're good there. I absolutly love the way this sounds. When I was reading it there was a certain feel to it, almost like a rap. It flows great and sounds good too.
Great job with this! Keep writing!
Some of your gramatical errors take away from the feel you are trying to get by writing this poem.But other than that your poem really is awesome!!
The title definitely suits the poem. There is a lot of emotion. The description is crystal clear about the person's feelings. Hatred is being reflected through the whole poem and that's a good thing since it's what you're writing about. I am looking forward for more poetry. So keep on writing like that.
Lots of emotion in here, it clearly expresses what you are trying to say. I was wondering if there are any reasons for the size of each stanza? It bugged me a little, but then again, I'm just weird like that.
So, it's fine, I'm just wondering why? Also, you need to edit!! It drives me crazy to see a lowercase "I". Seriously, for some reason that takes away from the whole poem. I noticed some missing apostrophes and other typos, but please, reread this? But, I liked the way you worded this, it's simple, which fits your narrator. 