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A broken piece

by Apehdavid2, David

I'm sitting alone on a chair in the middle of a room surrounded by tall shattered mirrors

The room is dark but somehow I manage to see the images on the mirrors

So many reflections!

Who are these people in the mirror?

Are these people reflections of who I am?

What are all these broken pieces?

Are they part of me ?

Are they part of the mirror?

Am I broken?

Is it just an illusion?

Looking to my left I see a ghost

Looking to my right I see a monster

I can see the images in the mirror talking and I hear them say

I'm a bad person

Others saying I'm selfish

Others saying I'm dark

But I couldn't care less about what these strangers had to say about me

But then I became aware of the fact that these are my reflections.

Even I, can't recognize who I am

Even I can't recognize what I've become

This is terrifying.

Am I the monster on my right?

Am I the ghost on my left?

Who am I then?

Or Rather

What am I?

Then I asked myself

Should I believe the images I see?

Am I just a reflection of bad?

Am I just a reflection of immorality?

Am I just a reflection of envy?

I tried screaming but the only voice I heard was that in my head

It shattered the glass into more pieces

More images of me in broken pieces

I realized the images i see are my thoughts

My darkest secrets,

My quiet screams,

My trapped nature,

So much mystery in broken glasses

So much misery in broken glasses

I asked myself why do I see a ghost then in my reflections?

The images gave me an answer which is

"I wasn't living life"

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60 Reviews

Points: 3296
Reviews: 60

Sun Nov 21, 2021 5:05 pm
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PoetryMisfit wrote a review...

Hi there.

I just wanted to leave a quick review. First off, I really enjoyed your poem; it was emotionally wrenching and profound. I really like the way you portrayed the narrator's darkest thoughts as shattered reflections and the fact that the narrator could not recognize them at first shows how detached he/she became from him/herself.

The flow was really good too, great use of shortened verses and repetition that really drew me in
"My darkest secrets,
My quiet screams,
My trapped nature"

I did want to point out a few things I noticed that could make your poem even stronger:

"Even I, can't recognize who I am
Even I can't recognize what I've become"
(I would recommend adding a comma after the second "even I" so your verses are consistent and adds a dramatic pause to compliment the first).

"Am I just a reflection of bad?"
(Just my opinion, but I would recommend replacing "bad" with a stronger, more pointed adjective).

"The images gave me an answer which is
'I wasn't living life'"
(I would recommend removing "which is" and maybe putting a colon after "answer" or not. It would make the last verse much more concise and dramatic, especially since it's the last verse of the poem).

I really, really liked your poem and I hope you keep writing!

- Poetry Misfit

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Apehdavid2 says...

Thanks alot I'll make the changes asap
I hope you keep reading

User avatar
960 Reviews

Points: 41
Reviews: 960

Sat Nov 20, 2021 6:12 pm
vampricone6783 wrote a review...

I loved reading this story! It really makes you think about who you are to your core.It makes you wonder about your true intentions and your darkest secrets.The mirrors could all be a representation of the narrator-or not.That’s the beauty of this story,the uncertainty and suspense.Overall,I enjoyed it.I hope you have a lovely day/night.

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Apehdavid2 says...

Thanks I appreciate

For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone.
— Audrey Hepburn