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Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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Straight off you've got to many emptys in there, the first line is fine but I'd strongly suggest cutting out that empty in the second line and find a better more descriptive word to use.
Because you use that first "mean" the "meanings" that you use multiple times just make the poem sound dull and repetitive. Replace the mean, and possible one of the "meanings".
Well so far what you have doesn't evoke any sort of response for me. The repetition doesn't really work, though I can understand what sort of effect you're going for.
One last thing, I'd post the whole poem next time, people won't coming back checking for the rest. PM when the rest is done though.
*inhales between teeth*
Yes... it was repetitive beyond words and if you finish I just might not come back to finish reading it...
*exhales*