Like the discription says, i like the concept but I need a new format, and i need help with that part.
Lost girl,
in a lost world,
fighting for a lost cause,
Found boy,
in a found world,
looking for the lost girl,
Lost jacket
found hat,
empty table,
The lost girl,
meets the found boy
looking in the lost and found.
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Then ending of this is simple and effective, and I liked it a lot; but the beginning is too simplistic and straightforward...I think it would work better if you implied in the beginning how one is lost and one is found. How a person can be lost - like there are pieces missing, or they feel like there are pieces missing. what would be a concrete way to describe being lost? Or maybe she's literally lost; constantly finding herself in the wrong hallway, the wrong room, the wrong time. And the found boy - what makes him found? Did he find himself? Is he made of 'found' things [like a found poem] and has he pieced himself together from the different things he's found? If so, what's he made of?
I think making the beginning more metaphorical would do a lot for this poem. It would give you an opportunity to play with language a little bit, it would give more of a character or personality to the boy and the girl, it would play with the ideas of 'lost' and 'found' [which can mean lots of different things!] -- and then, after the metaphorical part, all would be resolved in simplicity.
... wow, I hope that makes sense to you. If you have any questions or anything, feel free to ask! I'm always around to talk about poems with people who ask me stuff.
cheers
-B.
Hey
Good Poem I liked it a lot 
I especially liked the part where it said:
The lost girl,
meets the found boy,
looking in the lost and found.
Great Job! Keep it up!
wow, not the reaction i was hoping for. This site really shows the differences in the ways people regard poems, this one actually made MadHatter sick when i had him read it at school, he almost threw up and everything. again I say... Wow.
I liked it. I'm really not a fan of poetry, and there are only a few poems that I actually enjoy, this one is one of them. It is a nice piece. Good job.
TG
This is really short and not all that detailed. It seems like you're looking at the prespective view of soul-mates. Add more detail into it and show how they are soul-mates. I hope this helps.
I dont know much about poems, and formatting them or anything reallly...so I wilkl just tell you what I thought of the poem
I really liked this one, It fit together nicely and had a good flow.
I especially liked:
Lost jacket
found hat,
empty table,
Its so simple yet is effective, well done this is really good!
Meevs
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