Psychiatric

Well written,well thought of and it really expresses the idea very well.
It is really sad,emotional and deep.
It is very nice that you had made it in a way in which the reader reads it very smoothly and not ruins the flow while doing it so.I would usually be picky for the punctuation and all but now I will not be for who knows why.
I like work and it deserves the read.Thank you for sharing this with us,the readers and reviewers.Surely not a helpful review,ha? XD
I like the way the work is similar to the real world and bring the reality of a place like mental hospital.Sadness and lonelyness.A good job.

Hey!! this poem is just amazing. It has got a very different feeling.While I was going through this poem I felt sadness inside myself. It is very emotional and makes every person(who is reading it) cry. The flow of emotions is excellent. It reminds me of lot of people. From the beginning till the end there is something that keeps a reader attracted towards this poem. You have done very well. Good job

Hello! Tigerlilly here to review!

This poem connected with me on such an emotional level... I came across your poem in the spotlight and found it very beautiful yet sad and decided to read more. I'm so glad I did. This poem brings about the reality of a psychiatric facility, mental hospital, whatever you wish to call it. It's so well written it makes me want to cry. I just got out of a mental facility about a week ago (for schizophrenia), and in all honesty, you wrote this perfect.

Anyways, I wish I had something to nitpick on but you've written this so well and I can't find anything wrong. Please keep writing, I seriously look forward to reading more from you. You've got so much talent to put out into the world.

Have a nice day!

Glauke, thanks for requesting a review!

Critique sandwich time.

1. What did I like about this piece?
> I enjoyed the imagery of the stanzas, each one telling me something different but punching me with the same refrain.

> I liked the absence of punctuation to separate thoughts and emotions, which of course put me into the jerky mind flow of the narrator.

> I was swept away by the lack of pattern and yet predictable directions each stanza took.

2. What specific points need improvement?
> "you're scared they just forgot" doesn't really have as much impact as it should. It's sad that they wouldn't come because it slipped their mind, yes. But it's more tragic if they didn't come because they couldn't stomach it, or because they believed they'd fulfilled their duty already, reached their quota. And yet, I can't think of a way to substitute or improve this line without changing the flow and narration you've got going. Just something to think about.

> The second last stanza was nice to read until I really thought about it. If that's not all there is to her, but no one sees it, then how can you, the narrator, know that? Again, it'd be more tragic if you willingly play along with only seeing what you want to see. But again, this would completely change the message/tone of the poem.

> "when you're out" has a very optimistic feel to it, which is at odds with the rest of the poem, but the jarring nature does add to the stanza. Leaving off the smiling repetition is also clever in this stanza. It's like the narrator is more insane and yet more perceptive than before. The clarity and craziness is a pretty seductive pairing.

3. What are my concluding thoughts?
> This is a well structured piece. I struggled to find things I didn't like about it, because even the things I didn't like were ideas that when explored just caused me to think about them. Active thinking doesn't occur very often for me, when I read. I found myself deciphering and translating to make sense of it all. I would like to read more about this narrator.

Not my best review, but I hope it helped in some way.

All the best,
Jai

It's penned based on the loneliness of an individual
It's so touching that ot brought tears in my eyes.its like showingy own mirror. My own story. But now I've changed a bit. I try to be happy and keep others to the same. Great Glauke ... wonderful piece
Hope to read many more from you.keep up the awese carving

Love reading it again n again
Blessings

As someone who has been in a psychiatric hospital before I find this to be really moving. This is a great interpretation of how it feels, especially when you feel alone, when you cannot go outside, and are learning others stories. This explains how it feels really well and it is written quite beautifully. The "smiling" parts are really moving to me on how some do, some do not. This is worded very well. I love it! 10/10

Hi there, my name is Ash and I am here to review.

This was powerful.It actually brought tears to my eyes. It reminded me of someone I once knew as well. The emotion in this is just wow. I don't know what it's completely like to be there, I can only imagine.(I don't know if I am wording this correctly) but you made it easier for me to see like a small chunk of it.i like how you talk about the smiling and how your friends left as if they did not care.
Overall I give this a 10/10

Bless you