liesgirl

This was interesting. I'm not exactly sure what it was about, though. It seems to be something to do with music, but I can only tell that from the ending. ...

This is a fun piece. I like how you have such a long time between the sitting there in the beginning and the finally getting something out. You have several ...

I'm guessing that this is freeform, right? This may be a stylist technique I don't know, but you had "I am a prisoner of silence- The cold wind Has sealed ...

I love the premise! We rarely get to hear the inner thoughts of distressed damsels. If this is part of a larger story I understand why you didn't add more ...

This is an interesting article, though it's relation to the title and first paragraph is rather tenuous. You may want to add more to the first paragraph along the lines ...

This has an interesting start. Just a little tense thing before we start. You have most of the chapter in the past tense, but in a few paragraphs it switches ...

So is this part of another story? If so, you may want to mention that just so we know that some description is left out because it is somewhere else. ...

This is a very informative essay. There's just a bit of nitpicking to do. You said "Unlike so many industry trainers who have not actually huge successful in MLM, yet ...

Just a little nitpickiness, overall, the spelling and grammar was great. When you mentioned her "incarceration day" you said it like it was an occasion to be remembered. Unless you ...

You did a better job of scattering the descriptions this time! You probably could have passed Spencer off with a 'family resemblance,' mention, though. If you want us to get ...

This sounds like it could be an interesting story! I understand that you want to fit descriptions in, but maybe you could do it on the sly. You entire paragraph ...

Your grammar and spelling are impeccable, so we can skip that part. Your writing is detailed without being too self-involved. I feel like we got to know enough about Erica ...

I've read your other two parts, and they reflect well on the poem. I now see where the memory came from. You may want to mention that the story, while ...

Very nice, especially "Let it all Burn" and "Cruel November." It may just be personal preference, but I like when there is a theme, or a line that seems to ...

Again, the descriptions is great, though it could use more in parts. The lightning probably didn't just hit out of the blue. What signs were there that it was coming ...