bubblewrapped

I liked the first stanza, but after that it got a bit repetitive. Watch your punctuation and capitalization - it got a bit weird by the end. You might want ...

Just a tip - saying your poem is "really bad" isn't likely to garner many reviews ;) That said, it wasn't so terrible. The repetition of "if only" got old ...

Wow. That was awesome - smokin', if you'll pardon the pun. There were a few things I felt which didn't mesh. For example: entrance Me as he ensured he was ...

To be perfectly honest, I've heard this a million times in almost in the exact same words. My advice to you would be to scrap this and start again. This ...

I'd definitely capitalize the i's but otherwise I think it's pretty good. You have a nice sense of rhythm and your rhymes are quite natural, not forced. Your images are ...

This is very repetitious and has very little for the reader to connect with. As Snoink would say, it's something of a "shopping list" poem. Try showing us rather than ...

To be perfectly honest, I only got through half of it before I had to stop. Four pieces of advice: 1. Punctuate. It really helps the reader figure out how ...

This sounded like it had a lot to say, but there was only one problem - I couldn't really understand it. Now maybe that's just because I'm distracted and my ...

Hmm. You have a good grasp of rhythm and keep to it well; the repetition is used effectively, and I like the tone throughout. A few bits need to be ...

Some nice images, but they were disconnected and seemed rather repetitious. I'd suggest reforming this, taking the better lines - e.g. "the eye of the past" and "golden, meaningful times" ...

Like Cade I feel this started out well but steadily deteriorated. If I were you, I'd take this and try to reform it into something more serious. Humorous poetry is ...

I agree that you need to use poetry format here. Beyond that, the poem is rather formulaic. There is little in the way of technique and even less in the ...

This poem has the potential to be truly beautiful, but there's still more work to be done. Nothing can compare to nature; we retread this adventure, when no art and ...

I'm afraid I have to agree with Cade - there's nothing here for the reader to connect with. We've all lost friends, it's true, but you can't rely on the ...

Overall, I felt this was an OK poem but not particularly striking. I liked your imagery, and you seem to have a good grasp of rhythm. However, your subject matter ...