Published December 26, 2007
The charcoal scribbles were infinite lies
The vomit stain, all the secrets of dark
The ink blot was the hate and murder engraved on my stone heart
The stain of sin was my boarding pass to death
There wasn’t a glimpse of white on my robe
The pain never seeped through because the punishment was being preserved, ‘till my time of doom shone
Good became bad, and sick healthy
The delusions crept through my veins. A delusion of pleasure
A delusion of greed, a delusion of anger was my utmost truth
The charcoal scribbles were infinite lies
..::_!__[EDIT]__!__::..
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Yeah, cheers to you to Bubbles. I took your advise and cut it short! I hope it still sings out there entire meaning of the poem but yeah, thanks a lot!
God Bless~ KIM
I liked the first stanza, but after that it got a bit repetitive. Watch your punctuation and capitalization - it got a bit weird by the end. You might want to try tightening this up - minimize the repeated lines and streamline the images to make the poem more cohesive. If you ask me, it should have finished at the end of the first stanza; the rest adds very little.
Cheers,
~bubbles