Wiggy

Well, it's straightforward to say in the least! No doubt about that! :P First off, this seemed more of a statement than of a poem. To me, it didn't seem ...

It's a very run-on piece. I think you have a good idea here, but I think you need to work on not having so many run-on sentences in your poem. ...

Nice poem, rose! I think you did a good job on the rhyming scheme for the most part, but there were a couple of stanzas like the last two verses ...

Some of the sentence structure was indeed awkward. It was a great poem, and I personally thought the flow wasn't that bad. But you had a couple of sentences that ...

Ooo-write more, write more! This is grrrreat! :D I especially love the last excerpt from it. By the way, who does Ivy stand for? I can't think of anyone on ...

Keep this going! OMG I love it! lol It's a great storyline (totally reminds me of the Princess Diaries), but try to work on your grammar. There were a few ...

What more is there to say? Every single line was perfectly structured, you had enticing imagery, and wonderful language. Bob, you should always be in a good mood! :D

I really don't have a comment, except that it was really good Cal. You have a great knack for language, but take into mind what Brad says. He knows what ...

Sounds like something out of Pirates. :D I liked it! Basically what Kat said, except for the babe part. :D

Second one was much better. :D I still caught a few cliches in there such as "penetrating through the shielded emotions", which kinda came off to me as something that ...

but I see how the cold is manifold like small fibers woven This line seemed too long. I don't know-it just seemed like I was stumbling over syllables in this ...

Besides what Imp already stated, this seemed a little cliche to me. There was waaaay too many grammar mistakes for me to even count, but I know that that isn't ...

I liked the plot! It sounds interesting enough, but near the first part you seem to repeat information a lot. Also, make sure you keep the same tenses throughout. There ...

I told ya I would crit this, so I'm going to do a partial one. :D (Don't have time with school and all. :D) I really like the story line-it ...

Lovin' it Pros. I promise I'll get to it soon! Stupid geometry...:evil: Wiggy ;)