Epicdonkalous

Hey there! So I think this could be really interesting. I'm having trouble following your storyline, though, and noticed a few grammar and spelling errors scattered throughout, so i'd just ...

Hey there! Hm, so I find this quite interesting. Definitely looking forward for the continuation of this, since the ending leaves much to the imagination, and creates a longing for ...

Hey there! Hm, these lyrics/poem left me a bit confused. I think you should clarify your meanings of some of the stanzas. Like in "But why do you hate me? ...

Hey there! So I adore the way this is written. In the eyes of a young girl, suffering from something I think a lot of people can relate to. Props ...

Hey there! So I like the concept, but I do think you could change a few things to improve the quality of this story. First off, I think you used ...

Hey there! Well this is quite amazing! I adored it! It made me feel sad, and bit like I was mourning the life yet to come. Being 15, I'm scared ...

Hey there! Well this is a bit interesting. I do like the overall theme, but I have found a few flaws. Frist off, I really don't think that "bitch" is ...

Hey there! Okay. Only a few minor things I think could be improved... One, I'd remove the "then" on the lines "Why is it then so" because I think the ...

Hey there! Alrighty. First off, I did like the plot - assassins, supers, and wizards? Works for me. I feel that the second paragraph was a bit redundant and kind ...

Hey there! Glad to see you posting things so early. o: But anyway, on to the review. I do agree with CStar on the use of Fred's name. I do ...

Hey there! The first line " I see your pale, fetterless face with all the cuts you riddled across it that brutal and bloody day. " Um, I don't know ...

Hey there! Alright. So the theme - love, being nervous around someone you like. I think it's a bit played, and you didn't really capture the feelings in a way ...

Hey there! I think your concept was great, but it seems almost like you mocked it. It seems like you really don't care to answer the questions you posed at ...

Hey there! As LadyFreeWill said, the format is off. Try breaking up the bigger paragraphs, indenting, and putting dialogue separate from the regular lines. I think you made Evangeline pass ...

Hey there! Alrighty. Nice job of using adjectives, but I found some minor problems. First of all, the spacing is a bit off. "You are flying in the sky. The ...