Why is it so?

Wow! Jeg likte virkelig dette diktet - kan relatere til det, om du forstår. Selv er jeg veldig dårlig med dikt, så jeg beundrer alle som får det til Jeg tror hva jeg likte spesielt godt, er det med at selv om hun (antar det er en hun) kjente ham, forso hun ham ikke; alle mennesker føler vel at det egentlig ikke er noen der som virkelig forstår en. Jeg likte også dette med at hun visste hva hun skulle gjøre for reparere hjertet hans, reparere hva enn det var som var gått galt, men hun gjorde det ikke - og nå var hun knust, men det var hennes egen feil. Kan godt hende jeg har sett dette på en helt annen måte enn du tenkte deg det, men jeg synes det var veldig bra i alle fall^^ En god begynnelse!

You said me to much and understand in the first two stanza's, it didn't flow to well to me.. Shattered hearts, is a cliche.. so is the Jigsaw puzzle.. I suggest you start over.. maybe try a rhyme scheme and/or add more rhythm to your poetry.. you were going somewhere with it but to have it hard to read is no good. Poetry should have more eloquence.. Anyways good luck

Well , The one thing about this poem that stood out to me most was the last line "You made that decision yourself"

I like this line alone because it held the most of the emotion and it ended this generally great poem with a bang.

If you had ended it with that last stanza it would be just a great poem , With this last line in my opinion I think its a tremendous poem , if that even makes any sense to you.

Keep on writing,-T

Hi,
I thought I would do the full service of reviwing or part of it anywAY!

First of all, I really liked this poem, it had character, feeling and originality that I really liked, so kepp the good work up!

Anyway here goes!

If you ever knew me,
you would understand.
If you ever knew me,
You would care

Well that was one of my favorite stanzas as it illustrated your emotional point very well. I also thougt you created a flowing stanza that I really liked.

Why is it then so,
That you knew me,
And yet did not understand,
And did not care.

Again a beautiful flowing stanza with great originality. The only grammar mistake I can point out is with the first line I believe you have put an unncessary "then" which you cna take out.

My heart shattered,
Into pieces.
To me it looked like broken glass,
But to you it was a simple Jigsaw
You could see where the pieces were,
You saw it.
You knew which pieces would fit,
You knew.


Then why is it so,
That even when you tried,
You could not fix the puzzle,
That was yours to fix.



Why is it then so,
That even so simple,
As a Jigsaw puzzle,
My heart was yet not fixed.



Now I can see you,
And look into your heart,
I can see it's shattered,
But I won't help.
You made that decision yourself...

Sorry I could not finish it I have to go but I loved it alot so thank you for posting,

CM

I like this a lot! Will review it later but good job!

Hey there!

Okay. Only a few minor things I think could be improved...
One, I'd remove the "then" on the lines "Why is it then so" because I think the "then" isn't supposed to be there? Or is the so not supposed to be there? Either way, it sounds a bit forced and disrupts the flow.
Second, I think "shattered" is a bit overused.
Thirdly, "decision" was spelled wrong in the ending line.

Overall, though, I thoroughly enjoyed it! Keep up the good work~

~Epic