You are the one person that has always been there for me.
The one person I can rely on.
The one person I can trust to keep my secrets.
The one person I can't live without.
The one person that makes my world go round.
The one person I always think about.
The one person that's always in my dreams.
The one person I cherish and care for with all my heart.
The one person that I will love forever and always.
The one person.
That is you.
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139,365 Literary Works • 672,540 Reviews
I really love the repetition of
, it feels like a personal message. the ending should just be that is you, i think that would have more of an impact on the reader. i also love the repetition of always. i really like this work.I really love the repetition of
, it feels like a personal message. the ending should just be that is you, i think that would have more of an impact on the reader. i also love the repetition of always. i really like this work.I noticed a few grammar issues here. I'm afraid I am in a picky mood so I am really sorry.
In red should be spelt rely.Roughly ever two lines you should have a comma instead of a full stop, this is poetry not a story.
"The one person that makes my world go around" sounds better.
Replace always will, it just doesn't sound right. You could use "The one person that I will love forever and always."
Overall, I'm not mad about it. It's not my thing and you do definatly need work on your spelling and way of putting things but overall you did try your best. Keep writing.
This is a quite good poetry. But i wish you could put more elements of poetry such as metaphor and simile and personification. I think instead of using the word 'relie' you should use 'Rely'. It is more appropriate. Practices make perfect.