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क्या गलत है?

by nanda


मुझे उड़ना है...

बहुत कुछ करना है...

कि अगर मुझे उम्मीद करने की लत है,

तो इसमें क्या गलत है?

कोई हंसता है मेरे सवालों पर,

कोई देता है मुझे ही रुला,

कि मुझे अपने आप लिखनी अपनी किस्मत है,

तो इसमें क्या गलत है?

माना मैं अव्वल नहीं,

होगी मुझमें भी कमी कहीं,

पर मुझमें कुछ तो करने की काबिलियत है,

तो इसमें क्या गलत है?

चलो बन जाती हुं मैं भी दुनिया जैसी,

जिज्ञासा की कहां कोई इज़्ज़त है?

पर अगर ज़मीन पर रहकर, मिलाना चाहूं आसमां से हाथ,

तो इसमें क्या गलत है?

Translation

I will fly...

There is a lot to do ...

That if I am addicted to expectation,

So what's wrong with this?

Somebody laughs at my questions,

Someone makes me cry,

That it's my luck to write on my own,

So what's wrong with this?

Suppose I am not the top,

I too will be lacking somewhere,

But I have the ability to do something,

So what's wrong with this?

Come on, I become like the world,

Where is curiosity respected?

But if I want to join hands with heaven, staying on the ground,

So what's wrong with this?


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Tue Sep 22, 2020 7:46 am
Divyansh Dubey says...



Hi, @nanda ,
This poem is one the best poem I read on YWS
and this is an extremely illuminating poem and I like the way you have inspired each and everyone I believe who has read your poem. I hope you remember me
And keeping to your request I reviewed your work and I am happy about it.
Divyansh




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Sun Sep 20, 2020 3:35 pm
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Divyansh Dubey says...



Hi, @nanda ,
This poem is one the best poem I read on YWS
and this is an extremely illuminating poem and I like the way you have inspired each and everyone I believe who has read your poem.this poem has a different type of alacrity and is capable of spreading hope.
I hope you remember me
And keeping to your request I reviewed your work and I am happy about it.
Divyansh




nanda says...


Hello again Divyansh. I am extremely glad that you found my poem worthy of your praise. Thank you tonnes!!





You are the most welcome.





You are the most welcome.



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Sat Sep 19, 2020 6:49 pm
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Hkumar wrote a review...



Hey Nanda!

I'm glad you are back with a Hindi poem because there's always a very refreshing and inspiring touch in your poetry. The first two lines itself instigates an ambitious feeling to achieve success.

माना मैं अव्वल नहीं,

होगी मुझमें भी कमी कहीं,

पर मुझमें कुछ तो करने की काबिलियत है,

तो इसमें क्या गलत है?

Accepting that you may not be the best but still having faith in your abilities to prove your merit is very courageous. Loved the message.

चलो बन जाती हुं मैं भी दुनिया जैसी,

जिज्ञासा की कहां कोई इज़्ज़त है?

To be honest, this was my favorite part :) There's really not much appreciation and recognition given to raw talent and most people find that becoming a part of crowd and being in the bigger picture will only bring success. That's where creativity dies.

The last two lines gave a nice closure to the poem and summed up everything pretty well. The flow was very smooth and I was trying to read it aloud and felt that it's really so beautiful and conveys such true feelings. I hope you will continue to share your more work with us :D

Keep writing!
Image




nanda says...


Thank you Bunches!! @Hkumar
I am overjoyed to receive such a wonderful response to for my work. Thank you for you kind and encouraging words of praise.



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Sat Sep 19, 2020 8:36 am
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rida says...



Hi! I know how to read Hindi and I absolutely loved this poem, it’s amazing and I really like the way you wrote it, and it’s far much better in Hindi, I just wanted to say It’s one of my favourite poems......




nanda says...


Thank you tonnes @rida !
I am overwhelmed with the love you've showered upon my work. Thank you so much for giving your precious time to my work!!



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Sat Sep 19, 2020 2:16 am
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Stellarjay wrote a review...



Hello nanda!
I had to put this into google translate, and it has skewed results. I know that it sounds a lot more smooth and makes more sense in Hindi. But I will try make sense out of the garbligook on google translate!
Meaning
I believe the message in your poem is this: You are not the best at writing, but you know that it is what you are meant to do. Yet people laugh at you making you feel as if you aren't enough. I can relate to this in the sense that I feel as if I'm not enough. I'm sure a lot of people feel the same.

I won't be commenting/reviewing on grammar, rhyming or rhythm since I do not speak Hindi. Also like I said before, your poem sounds better in your own language and you won't get the same effect in English. Anyways, keep on writing and have a great rest of your day!
Stellarjay




nanda says...


@Stellarjay That was sweet of you to read my poem. However, I suppose you've not been able to understand the language and catch the message very properly. That is ok. I will explain it to you. Actually I'll put up a translated version if this work there. You can read it if you want to...



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Fri Sep 18, 2020 4:54 pm
Vil says...



Translation?





Painting is poetry that is seen rather than felt, and poetry is painting that is felt rather than seen.
— Leonardo da Vinci